1674 5 3
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Hunger only makes people hungry, but bad hair can ruin your whole day.
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1674 4 3
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1. BLAME THE PARENTS This seems to be the most popular position on social platforms. Mom and Dad should have been watching this kid more closely. Period. Because how could any good parent fail to notice their own child climbing over a…
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1674 3 0
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"Every single thing ... " Hunk Hokum pronounced from the stage, flexing his muscles and prancing around in his red pseudo-loincloth, "has been totally scripted ... and ... every action ... has been ... preplanned-out ... in advance!"
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1674 11 9
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Your precious feet were there once, pressed against the familiar floorboards, where your poems suddenly appeared to you, flashing like lightning. I wonder which window they came in? Here's a thought: you were like that window. You caught…
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1674 7 4
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Things aren't going to get better are they? Would you like a sugar cube? No. Are you sure? I put acid on it. Oh, well yes, I guess then. Cool. Things might get better for a little bit then. Or horribly worse. Ha. Awesome. They taste like an orgasm…
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1674 0 0
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He was arrested for a horrible crime. It took more than three weeks to identify the body. The newspapers were vague so as not to terrify anyone. He hung his head low as he pled guilty.
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1674 12 9
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His knife enters the Maui onion. He minces garlic and applies heat to pan and melts sweet cream butter and browns the garlic first and then he adds the onion and more heat, but it's time that will surely caramelize them. Salt and pepper and splashes of wine for the pan and…
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1674 15 12
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She wears three or four tattered sweaters on cool days. She pushes a basket borrowed from a grocery store. There is a plastic lawn bag in the basket with God knows what inside.
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1674 2 0
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I remember being sent a picture once from one of my old roommates, Louise, back in Chicago where I came from. The photo was taken when she’d come out for a visit to California. In the picture I am sitting on the front stairs of my house in the Rockridge
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1674 7 7
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When God blessed creation, a ewe gave birth to Adam. When he cursed Satan, Eve hatched from a crocodile's egg.——In naming the animals, Adam marked them for death. His own name was a slow fire. Eve's was an inferno.——In the shelter of the Tree of…
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1674 6 3
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You took up residence on the dark side of things, a bolthole in a wind-flayed right angle of a tower block where pigeons and suicides tumbled blackly on the air currents. You set about drifting off from who you were on a tide of cheap whisky and bad poetry, graduating…
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1674 19 14
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We all//
fall short and fail.
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1674 0 1
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It was with the departure of their last child that the Beazleys became grotesquely petty with each other.
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1673 3 2
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A woman walked in from the kitchen. She sat next to him as he poured what was left in the whiskey bottle into each glass. “They could’ve given us more time to make a payment,” he said.
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1673 14 11
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1673 17 6
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The Viper turns so quickly that Father's grabbing hand now faces its head instead of its tail.
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1673 2 0
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I love reading about myself. There's nothing more gratifying than seeing my name in the paper, knowing so many people are interested in who I am and what I do.
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1673 7 4
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The investigator starts by accumulating facts, as many facts as he can. He sifts through them with meticulous precision, leaving no leaf unturned, no page unread.
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1673 6 2
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"What is a vageena?" I wanted to know.
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1673 15 12
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(I'd appreciate some feedback on this very weird story.) A Frosted Mini Wheat walks in to a bar...
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1673 4 3
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I take the plastic off of the last videotape and stick it in the VCR. I make sure the channel is on 6. Still a commercial. I get my notebook, turn it to the next page and write today's date on top. I get ready. I don't really like the back and forth banter the other news…
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1673 8 2
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It was so hot we walked out on our husbands. There were reasons, we supposed. They left the refrigerator doors open all day, grabbing beers when they passed by, tossing the sticky caps upon counters. They drove their Metropolitans to buy food, leaving th
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1673 15 9
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fat furry marmots who play hide and seek
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1673 28 16
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Lately he's been wanting to write about love...
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1673 7 3
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Having read the poetry of Dennison
I hereby give up writing.
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1673 5 3
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Commencons (let us begin) our deconstruction of la bouteille typique de shampooing (the typical shampoo bottle).
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1672 13 7
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Here’s how you do it. First you get a ladder, a long one.
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1672 3 3
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I know I’m slipping
into my mother’s skin. I answer the phone
with her voice; her hands grind the coffee beans.
And who is this listening to NPR in the morning
while the fresh-faced girls in the neighborhood trudge toward school,,
peonies han
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1672 5 4
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Never touch David Letterman's neck!
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1672 6 6
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A son packs his bag - bottled water, extra masks, and jerky. Mom paces behind him. “Don't go.”
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