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Obituary for a Poet Heretic

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He sat on a leather couch in the nude, blew smoke rings shaped like wild animals and picked verses out of the thick air.

How Chupacabra Broke the Heart of God

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And God said, Let us create a being in our image, after our likeness, for God was alone in the universe.

Little People

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If you consider yourself neither little nor big, remember that anything large, colossal, macroscopic, ample, sizable, blown-up, bulky, mighty was once small, lesser, minute, tiny, dinky, gnomish, weeny or lilliputian.

The Way You Live Now

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You make a mental note of the rising number of people that know you. You vow to trim the list.

Slices

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It was one of the first things she did after they opened the wall. That’s at least what she told me years later, more than 1000 miles from Berlin.

The Sun Eaters

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And in the end, when there was nothing left and we all had come to look like whispers, we ate the sun.

Rewind

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Multiple Simultaneous Submissions

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He looked at the receiver in his hand as it hummed its dead-line song. His hand shook. Shit, he thought.

Ten Amazing Don’t-Miss Writing Prompts (Especially Number 6)!

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Write a list of what's wrong with everyone else.

Le Sucre Brun

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The commandant pried her lids open with steely thumbs.

The Names of Things

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She's having trouble remembering the names of things.

Common Password Profile Users: God, Love, Lust, Money, and Private

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She leans to see fresh bruises in dawn's early light.

The Sodomized Dictator

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Ghosts.

Cactus

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I counted telephone poles and the seconds between them. The old highway cut straight through the sand and it seemed the road would never end. No curves. No hills. Just poles.

1974, What I Wanted

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If there had been arranged marriage in eighth grade, the grade it used to be and still sometimes is when children left school to work in the fields, I would have hoped that my parents would have arranged for me to marry Mike.

A Forest

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Her mind was full of fresh air and swung like a bee over clover.

The Wall: A Love Story, Of Sorts

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I need to get in and out, you say.

The Serious Writer and His Penis

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Only strong personalities can endure such size, the weak ones are extinguished by it.

In The Lake

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She says, “Put it there now.”

Watermelon

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It was like the time we broke icicles dripping from the low eaves and brandished them like swords...

Someone Emailed Me Last Night and Asked if I Would Write About Nachos.

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I fell into a crevasse once. I jumped off a bridge once, right before a train was to hit me. Jumped off roofs several times. I have a thing for jumping. The truth is that everyone is bored, and devotes himself to nachos.

How To Rescue A Drowning Man

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Maybe you should consider a few more things before embarking upon actual rescue, like: Is the victim hot? Not stove hot, idiot. Beauty hot. Will this be a triumph to save this person (like perhaps they are some Nobel laureate), or are you risking you

Almost There

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...children live in the moment like no one else. Which is a good lesson for us all, especially when crossing an ocean. Because out here you are alone with the rhythm of your thoughts and the ghosts of your past.

Headstone

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On the ground deputies comb the back roads. Border Patrol scouts from the air

At the Bar

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On the Nightly News a pedophile in an orange jumpsuit does a sashay of shame in front of a wolf pack of cameras and satellite feeds that surround the downtown courthouse. At the bar, a woman with big blonde hair and a rhinestone manicure says off with his head. A…

Revenge at the Nudist Camp

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When my mother called to tell me what had happened with Francine, she was crying. The minute Francine left, my mother understood that woman had bamboozled her. We got on the next jet down to L.A. and rented a car. Gina and I drove all the way out past Ont

Simulacra

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*** Winner of the 15th Glass Woman Prize. Thank you, Beate Sigriddaughter.

Sweet Sounds of Home

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Father makes sure the rum is safe, and still down, on his ass, he unscrews the top and takes a slug, and then a second one.

Descanso

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Lupe says stealing is bad whether it's from a Baptist or a Catholic.

Piece of Mind

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Samuel wondered if Megan could hear the brains humming, but like so many of the questions Samuel had for Megan, it was difficult to find the right moment to ask.