Smiley McGrouchpants, Jr-Esq-III

Location Milepost 5 (Portland, OR)
Occupation Situationist. Upender. Scribe.

Books by Smiley McGrouchpants, Jr-Esq-III
  • by Smiley McGrouchpants
    , 2017.

  • by Smiley McGrouchpants
    , 2017.
  • About Me
    It's top secret. I took an Internet IQ test though, and, apparently, my IQ's 127 (stupid Internet test!).

    I'm available for parties and misjudging people. I can ride a pony and race a horse but, I, just, won't, drive, a car!

    You understand ...

    More here:

    Why do you write?

    You realize your back's up against a wall when you find out *you're* the enemy, or the 'other,' or the blithely and unfairly diagnosed.

    "The writer is simply someone who tunes in to certain cosmic currents. He's sort of a transcriber, an explorer, a map maker."—William S. Burroughs

    More here:

    Any favorite authors? Books?

    Daphne du Maurier; Bruce Sterling; and Thomas Pynchon.

    Obviously, the REAL list of authors would be too long to list here -- as I imagine it would for ANY practicing fiction writer -- but those'll do as "emblematic," I suppose.

    FAVORITE BOOKS: "Rule Britannia," "Virtual Light," and "V." from the above.

    Might as well add "The Last Man" by Mary Shelley (which I just recently finished), "Amerika, or the Man Who Disappeared" by Franz Kafka (actually the only Kafka I've EVER read, incredible as it may sound), and "The 'Genius'" by Theodore Dreiser (which I am currently reading) for flavor.

    And Pagan Kennedy -- pretty much everything by her -- but since that would take you through fiction into 'zines, journalism, history, comics, and what not, she might not be as easily "peggable" as a straight fiction influence for me.

    Though, you know what? Maybe everything listed above is what I try to cram into/cover in my own fiction. Probably I learned most of it -- the yearning and reaching, as well as the level of accomplishment -- from her, so she'd probably be the ideal reference.

    So, I'll say: Pagan Kennedy. My "literary god" (to quote and affirm someone else, I forget who).

    [Is this a bit much? I'll shut up now. Thanks.]

    ALSO FAVES O' MINE: Douglas Coupland; Philip K. Dick; Simone de Beauvoir; Jean-Paul Sartre; Dorothy Parker; Chuck Palahniuk; Jack Kerouac; Herman Melville; William S. Burroughs; Emma Forrest; Leslie Stella; Jenna Black; Mario Acevedo; Jes Battis; Ian McEwan; Roberto Bolaño; Ramsey Campbell; Alain Robbe-Grillet; Theodore Dreiser; Chelsea Quinn Yarbro; Stephen King; Peter Straub; John Shirley; Clive Barker; Jack Womack; Ambrose Bierce; Sarah Vowell; Jim Knipfel; Paul Lukas; Marco Vassi; Mark Leyner; Willa Cather; Haruki Murakami; John Shirley; and Flannery O'Connor.

    STARTED ME OUT: Lara Cohen, The Frantz Sisters ("Frantzine" -- 19 and 17-year-olds interview The Folk Implosion, when "Natural One" is on the radio no less), Richard Linklater (book for movie 'Slacker'), Peter Buck (liner notes to 'Dead Letter Office').

    More here:

    And, lest we forget, the "Strangelovian" exchange, forthwith:

    Here's what I listen to. Buy 'em:

    Here's where I schmInstagram it:

    Smiley McGrouchpants, Jr-Esq-III's Wall

    Jeffrey S. Callico – Oct 30, 2022

    Thanks for reading Commercials and for the *

    Ulrica Hume – Jun 19, 2018

    thanks for your comment on "Ambassador of Nowhere."

    Rabbit Angstrom – Apr 04, 2015

    Dude, your profile list awesome:::I must say I could word you out with voracious boundary blurring awkwardness that relates as a loquacious spirit. You're style rocks too--- word

    Ann Bogle – Oct 19, 2014

    I want to fave each CMcG story even before I read the ones I haven't read to remember the ones I did read. FAVE

    Larry Strattner – Oct 19, 2014

    What about Nora Roberts, for crying out loud?

    DJ Young – May 02, 2014

    Hello and thank you for reading and commenting on 500 Words - I'm enjoying your profile. :-)

    Barry Friesen – Sep 24, 2013

    Yes, a side order of awards, please. Hold the glitter. I thought a side order of orgasms would be too much. Thanks for looking in on my silliness, Christopher.

    Bill Yarrow – Jul 14, 2013

    Thanks for commenting on and faving "Dead Parental Units." I appreciate both very much.

    Amanda Harris – Jul 12, 2013

    Thanks for the kind words (and fave) on "Beware the Armed Man". I got the idea for the linebreaks, ironically enough, on a poetry site called Linebreak.

    Rabbit Angstrom – May 25, 2013

    Hey Christopher, thank you for your kind comments on the horse short. it means to much as it was a very difficult time to express such dismal shit. but writings cool for that you kno-pax and thank you again!

    Amanda Harris – May 21, 2013

    Wow. Thank you for your commentary on "After Prom". I never tried to teach anyone to "walk the walk"--but I'm glad I did.

    Rabbit Angstrom – May 11, 2013

    Thank you Christopher for your comment on ted nugent. It means so much coming from you.

    David Martin – May 09, 2013

    Thanks for your comment + fav on my story "Erased". Much appreciated.

    Con Chapman – May 05, 2013

    Christopher--Glad you enjoyed The Last Game. I am a Univ. of Chicago grad too.

    Gloria Garfunkel – Dec 25, 2012

    Thanks for the comments on Snowflakes and the references.

    Christopher Allen – Jul 10, 2011

    Hi, Christopher. Thank you for your encouragement on the story "The Language." Very much appreciated.

    Christopher Allen – Apr 16, 2011

    Hey, Christopher,
    Thank you for reading and commenting on "A Literary Separation". Much appreciated. :)

    Randal Houle – Nov 06, 2010

    Welcome Christopher.

    Wendy Wimmer – Nov 30, 2009

    Welcome, Mr. Snyder.

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