Most read stories

My Rat

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Today I'll make the call

You Were At Your Best with Strings Attached

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You were like a delicate lace that barely mentions the wrist. But you were also at your best with strings attached. Let me say this. If innocence is supposed to be so overwhelming as to do nothing on purpose, not carried away by sensatio

Suky Tawdry's Cab

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yet fiction, despite contrary reports, from two ends of the American spectrum, does not mean lies, in my HUM

Check Engine

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“How’s the Pinto running?” Sean says. It’s been awhile. Maybe Darcy won’t remember him.

A Glimpse

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I am everything she wanted me to be. I am crossed legs, chest out; I am wearing a soft white dress—lacy and completely inappropriate to the Midwest, to 2011, to anything about my existence.

Me and Sid and Tom and John Yount

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True story

White Bread

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Brian takes off his size eleven shoe and shakes it out on the table.

A Horse Walks into a Bar

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I got this job where I sell snow cones from a cart in a petting zoo. Parents ask if their children can take pictures with me. I neigh and nod my big horse head. After my shifts, I go into the bar, still in my getup, as this horse, and the bartender says,

Furniture Fights

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It amazes me that with everything this woman has to be depressed about, what really gets her down is an inadequate lounge chair.

The Blue Bird

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The blue bird tapped at my window and pecked my crumbs. I talked to him as to a small person about the things of life, of flowers, of trees and the sky. Even at times pretending he was erudite, I questioned him about evolution and extinction. He looked at me as if he…

The I Hate to Fuck Book

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This book is for those who have learned that sex is one of life's unpleasant experiences--like paying taxes, or renewing a driver's license--that does not become less painful through repetition.

Dr. Doom

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I passed out one night while I was standing at the sink brushing my teeth.

Three Stories Of You

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There's a story of you who says to go on, to walk the room, to pretend to contemplate. Promises that if you lift your hand your head will follow. Assures you when your bones reignite there will be day, there will be night, and you'll know which is which. Don't worry about…

An Open Letter To My Vagina

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Dear Vagina,You are my oldest and dearest friend. We have been through so much together, haven't we? I remember the first day I really got to know you. It was about eighteen years ago. I thought I was dying, but it turns out I wasn't. …

All is Ready

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I have bathed in patchouli oil and my heavy hair is lustrous from brushing. I am wearing my gold ankle bracelets with the ruby charms that my love gave me when we had been married one year. My robe is fuchsia silk and under it I wear black satin…

When To Break Up With Your Gynecologist

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He asked what I used for birth control and I told him, “prayer”. He smiled the kind of smile you smile at young girls who don’t know any better.

Jacques Derrida, 9/11, And The Democracy Which is Yet to Come

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The decision to wage war on terrorism gave to terrorism its political legitimation.

Another Version of My Life, in Which I am Played by Meryl Streep

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Rerunning, now it's published.

Estate

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In the kitchen they discovered the instruments. A flute under the sink tucked behind a rusted silver pipe. An oboe on the floor in the pantry. And a violin across the ice tray in the freezer, now dark. "Not ice," sister said, holding it up by the neck.

Superfoods

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It doesn’t get dark for hours but Sam doesn’t know that. Mum bought extra-thick blinds for his bedroom windows.

Missed Connections

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We were on the L train.You were reading Fifty Shades of Gray;I was reading One Hundred Years of Solitude. You never looked up until just as I moved off, always looking back your way and hopingyou would lift your head. And then you did, at the last moment,but…

Badabing Badaboom

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Tony Soprano said, “My pal Franco is a misunderstood hopeless romantic. If you don't capiche that, I'll have a conversation with your kneecaps.”

Poetipedia

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. . was the earliest born of the not-so-great Pedantic Poets . . . . beleaguered by family financial crises that continued to the beginning of his life, he suffered periods of deep elation . .

Flatulence

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He was not supposed to leave handcuffs or a butt plug laying around.

Healing Romance of the Rose

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The dying rose spoke to the wood That kept in it's heart a love of good And all that was in bloom It could not let that happy rose Fret about in terrible death throes Would not be its tomb.

First Contact

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All through their descent sequence K’var had nervous premonitions.

The Statue of a Writer

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As I sat down finally, finally to write, some brooding heretical hour of the night, with my ballpoint in hand, poised to blot page, Time gathered momentum, although I did not age...

Bone Density

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Madame Fauve, / with a twisted braid, is dancing.

Some Last Things

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if you whisper your truths, they'll disappear

Gyrle (n.) - Boy or girl

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Is it better to have a boy or a girl? That's not a rhetorical question. I'm really asking. When I was four, I used to wedge myself in between the wall and refrigerator and yell out, “Help! I'm stuck!” It was my mom's least favorite game. Meanwhile, half a