1779 6 6
|
Oh, gracious mercy, oh...
|
177996
|
Gather 'round children, For it's high time to tell, The story of a strange man With a horrible, awful smell. For this is a story More disgusting than most. This is the gruesome tale Of Gary Von Gross. With a house made…
|
177921
|
Ripper the dog died after eating a Quarter which had lodged in Ripper's throat choking her to death. Steve Latino buried her in the backyard the next morning. He felt nothing…
|
177943
|
Viewed correctly, nature is an inexhaustible storehouse of clichés. A successful landscape is their pleasing rearrangement.
|
177923
|
But the boy next door is worse than a dweeb; he's a prima donna and a bully and a little shit to boot. The divorce will only make him more.
|
177932
|
and i'm almost out of cigarettes,
and fireworks and sorority girls
scream
from down the street.
|
177984
|
"This tastes like goat cheese," I said.
|
177963
|
Suds, like gossamer bandages at her wrists, concealed the turbulence below but could not relieve it.
|
177822
|
John was sitting at his computer one night after work, when he read an article linked to him by a friend.
|
177800
|
You know what parents have to do to get an Xbox? They don't just stand in line and someone hands them an Xbox, OK? That's sacrifice. They have to sacrifice and sacrifice and sacrifice. I mean, I chase alpacas a mile every night in subfreezing conditions,
|
177810
|
I'm completely naked in an unheated basement, about 40 first year university students, most of them female, are staring at my ridiculous waif-like body.
|
17782111
|
I am not the wind./
I am a stone eroded by the wind
|
177853
|
Although still uncertain of whether she was a she fish or a he fish (she definitely hated being an it fish), the fish liked what she saw of Nags Head. Finally, a world that gave her a choice. And felt no need to verify whether she was a real she fish, or just a he fish…
|
177831
|
1. there's nothing more to say about it and I don't want to be drawn2. beautiful she couldn't hear me anyway I was desperate and there were moths3. they'd replaced his head with a picture of the moon he looked4. none of them were speaking English more like a ticking a…
|
177873
|
Her skirt is so short, said the teenage girls to each other. I was 7 years old. I said: she looks like a slut. They laughed; I blushed. Later, the slut smiled at me. I tried to find the teenage girls but they were gone. I wanted to say: it's actually a pair of…
|
177842
|
Mama sleeps in bed with us. The blue of her ghost sleeps underneath me. I love her more than anything. What does she think when we are naked, when we yell, or mimic, imbibe, curse, cry, shake, make love, roll over on her, want to die?
|
177865
|
“Hey honey. How are you?” The man sat down in the office chair, his cell phone pressed against his ear. Light peeked beneath the closed door from the main area of…
|
177810
|
They're bound to wonder what sort of offspring we'll hatch. We've done the tests, we are cross-fertile.
|
177820
|
‘Just get out of bed,’ I reply. ‘It looks like the fairies have been at your head. You should turn your clothes inside out. Put out a biscuit. Ring a bell. Buy a rooster; or a recording of it crowing. It will keep the sprites at bay.
|
177831
|
I cannot find my way back to the bubbling navel of the universe because of Spongebob Squarepants.
|
177800
|
|
1778103
|
Often I eat lunch at the hospital. The cafeteria may be the best place to eat in town.
|
177842
|
So begins your new career in the car service business. In some ways you enjoy it, too. Sitting alone in the cab each day, totally your own boss; you get a surge of excitement inside thinking about the money you'll make in a way that requires so little work. Clearing two…
|
177811
|
“Man, that Fats just nothin’ but a powerhouse, nothin’ but ‘Jesus Rolled Away the Stone’ and them Cats his apostles.” La KeeSha replied, “Ya’ll a real Blues Daddy now.”
|
177732
|
He was drinking heavily again and complaining that there was nothing fresh worth writing about.
|
1777127
|
Val walks through the world, absorbed in the day to day. A plainspoken narrator drones on in his mind. The nondescript voice marks time to the beat of Val's banal footfall, hums along with the whir of Val's modest, midsize sedan. The narration is loudest in the twilight…
|
177700
|
He awoke with a start. This was not the first time he did so. He couldn't afford these occasional bouts of sleep. And certainly not in the land of the Tsantsa hunters.
|
177733
|
Don’t worry about what went aloud. I said nothing.
|
177731
|
My small kitchen has barely enough room to turn around in, yet I had the feeling I was being watched. When I experience it again, just seconds later, I realize it was eyes watching, actual eyes, not a camera or machine.
|
177752
|
I know what he meant.
I've been in the 3 A.M. cream cheese.
I've known the hole in the bagel.
|
