My writing speaks for itself, which is why I am constantly shouting over it. Two things I can't stand are hypocrites and egoists. Also, people who open a fresh loaf of bread and refuse to take the top slice. So three things. Oh, and Kelloggs Cereal. When did Sugar Pops turn into "Corn Pops" Or Super Sugar Crisp turn into "Golden Crisp?" Plus, their Pop Tarts don't taste as good as they used to. So, four things I hate.
"I've Been Deader," a near perfect blend of horror and comedy, is finished and can be purchased on amazon.com. In order to combat boredom while waiting for certain publishers and agents to put me out of my misery, I published "Inside My Shorts: 30 Quickies." They are guaranteed to entertain. If you have a few bucks and a song in your heart, you can download it here: http://www.amazon.com/Inside-My-Shorts-Quickies-ebook/dp/B006NGE8QW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1324741590&sr=8-1 I'm funny, a bit blue, and a little gassy. What more do you need to know? Stick around. We'll have some fun.
Almost forgot. People who think the world needs to know that they've memorized the entire script to "Monty Python and the Holy Grail." We ALL know the movie by heart, numbnuts. We just don't feel the need to burst into impromptu recitals at every friggin' dinner party.
So, five things.
Twinkies. So I'm screwed.
Oh yeah, and ATM Fees. I didn't charge my bank anything to take my money, so why am I being charged to get it back? Fuck you banks.
Who has time to read these days.
I'll tell you something else. If you're going to sell me a cheeseburger via drive thru window, don't assume I want mayonnaise on it. You aren't killing me fast enough with your regular garbage? What world did I wake up in where the unspoken rule is "If you don't say anything, I'll just put some mayo on it"?
Okay. So there's only seven things that bother me.
Oh! And those people who
Hall of Fame with the Author Bio thing. Hilarious and pissed off. Nice combo.
You are quite right. I over indulged with the buttermilk image. I fell in lust with it :) But it should go x
Oh! Quickies while to read while your agent waits. I see.
<em>I've Been Deader</em> is a great and humorous title. Since it is guaranteed, I am afraid to follow the link to it. I feel weird about going to where it is, one of seven conjunctions goes here, and, the title is great.
Glad you liked that bit of my "Seascape", Adam, thanks!
Get better, you magnificent creature. I need my zombie hilarity.
Thanks for your comment on Short.
Just now came across your magnificently crafted comment on my flash story Peacemaker. I am in your debt, but for chrissakes don't let Amazon find out!
Oh god. The software.
(I laughed so hard I cried and read that post to the cat.)
My wife bought Final Draft years ago. I'm sure it's outdated now. She never used it. Maybe there's a freebie clone. You might also consider downloading Sorkin's screenplay for The Social Network. It's free, altho I don't recall where I found it. I've heard tell it's one of the better treatments in the cosmos.
Welcome to Fictionaut, Adam! Way to dive into the deep end.
Oh man. Twinkies. Yeah, you're screwed.