Killing with kindness

by Adam Sifre

I have a few medical issues.  My knees hurt after I play tennis and I have trouble sleeping.

Oh yeah, and I have a machine that keeps my heart pumping and I'll need a heart transplant. 

So, I'm doing what I need to do to get on the list.  After my heart attack last year, I was unable to earn a living (I blame you.  Would it have killed you to actually buy my book?).  The great state of New Jersey bestowed upon me MEDICADE.

That would have saved my life.  It allowed me to get the LVAD -- the thing that's keeping my heart pumping, and would have allowed me to get a heart transplant, eventually.

But then...

But then the government said I could have Social Security Disability payments.   


A few dollars in my pocket.  I had some nice meals, spent some time with a beautiful woman.  (It turns out, she loves me with or without social security.)  Paid some of my kids' expenses.

But then...

But then, medicade sent me a letter saying: "You make too much.  No more health insurance for you."

That was a problem.  I called the lawyers.

"You're telling me that because one government is giving me money so that I can live, another government is taking away the one thing I need to live."


But thank god for OBAMACARE!  I went online and filled out whatever it was I had to fill out and, BANG!  I can have health insurance!  YAY!

But then ...

But then, the hospital where I would get the transplant spoke to me in the form of a  woman with a nice voice. 

"Here's the thing!" she said.  "This hospital isn't crazy about Obamacare and, like most hospitals in New Jersey, we are only accepting second tier plans in the hope that Obamacare will change.

"That sucks for me."

"Yes, it does!"

"I was going to get the first tier insurance, but I guess I'll get the second and pay a lot more out of pocket." 

Not the end of the world.  Not yet.

But then ...

But then, she told me: "Here's the thing.  We only accept second tier insurance polices, but if that's the health insurance you have, you won't pass the financial requirements to get on the transplant list."


She repeated what she said.  Her advice was to try to get back on Medicade. 

Good advice! 

It's okay though.  I've already picked out my Tombstone:

"Here lies Adam Sifre.  He tried, and that's what's important."

The end.