1472 3 2
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“Guys, who would you rather live with.... Mom... or Dad.”
His younger siblings giggled in shock, not that they hadn’t thought about it... apparently.
"You know I'm right here..." I joked, waving at them.
“I’d rather live with mom.” the question-a
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1472103
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I am confused by your new paper-doll look, btw. Could you please look regular again by Thursday?
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1472159
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Conjure calamity and calamity comes.
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147255
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where will we be/ when it happens?
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147287
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I love Hooters. Best cheese steak in town in my opinion.
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147132
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a dim wood-paneled stair leading to the ladies’ rooms, candle-lit.
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147121
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Just an abnormal visit to the post office.
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147176
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Ross, I've been a ghost hunter for almost 10 years now and this is a place I said I WOULD NEVER NEVER EVER go to!
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147164
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The heart would have unnatural reverence, exalted, bursting with evil, rolling in sloth, if it did not at once reveal its innocence. I saw you again, on the morning of the sun. It was you, or your double, or a son you might have had. Your beautiful bloo
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147176
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Safe does not ride horses at sunsetSnorkel in MolokaiRaft down a swollen river.It does not steal kisses in a darkened theaterTouch the inside of a thigh under a restaurant table.Safe does not declare war.It chooses dinner every night at sixMass every SundayConfession once a…
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147130
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147111
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*Must have excellent communication skills and be able to talk pretty good.
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147100
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When we saw the window, we were impressed. It was so clean and transparent that it reminded us of a new pair of glasses, everything so crisp and clear through it. It looked on to nothing. Actually it looked on to the refridgerators and a few stoves, though most of the…
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147178
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147163
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Some people are born that way, and some people do things to themselves
that keep them from talking. Like opening up a soda bottle with your mouth.
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147141
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You can't always be everything
you were expected to be
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147100
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Grayson Warren is living the American Dream: a 15-year career as a city cop, a great wife and two kids. And then one day his dream turns into a nightmare.
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147142
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Years ago, I was involved in a freakish tragedy so startling and heartbreaking that it made the front page of not only my local newspaper, but “People” and “The National Enquirer.” I'm not going to tell you anything about it. This means that…
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1471118
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every timeyou openyour mouthan angel fallsinto a vat of whiskyshut ityou're fucking up heaven2013 - Rene
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147131
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the vigilance that informs a parent's every hour had momentarily lapsed
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147155
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There are certain items in the sink that are giving me an anxious feeling in my stomach.
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1471107
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The Tea Party member was married but cuter. He worked as a caulker, a tub and basin man.
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147121
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My third Rule of Success—and I may not have these in exactly the right order–is always get a pre-nup!
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147145
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Today I’m feeling crabby and haggard and technology makes it easy to get to the point.
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147032
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I am not responsible for any nightmares this piece may cause for all you mice lovers!
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147021
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The kitchen is full of old girlfriends. I avoid them. They are munching on cheddar and sharing stories I'm sure I don't want to hear.
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147021
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I want the luxury of hearing other people who disagree with me tell me why I’m an asshole!
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1470109
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After becoming single at age 62, I joined an online dating site. After a year of perusing profiles and meeting men for coffee, staying single is starting to look better and better to me. But I've stayed on the site, in part for the pure enjoyment of…
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147082
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She wore no bra. As she jammed the truck into park and pushed against the heavy door, he saw the points of her nipples against her dress. Ice filled his belly, the most beautiful pink-colored ice.
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147051
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“There are so few uses for Crisco, that to keep it in the house seems an unnecessary temptation,” said my health teacher.
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