Most recent stories

(The Larger Structure) is the Poem

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. . . with reference to the Compass of Discourse

Oh, Danny Boy

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I wore a padded bra. Proud of my tits. D. ordered a Bloody May, I had a vodka tonic. After the second drink I slipped out into the fog, and smoked a little weed. I could see Long Island College Hospital across the street. To my right, the BQE rose up

The Crazy Woman in the Bookstore

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“How do you know she’s crazy? Seems to me that’s a perfectly rational reaction,” she said without looking up at first, but then glancing at him with a sly smile.

Cry Wolf

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"You are wolves circling, eyes burning in the dark...."

Another Time

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Papa was fucking the artist’s wife, Lillian, and the artist knew it but was afraid to say anything and she had broad, muscular brown arms and loved the sun on the sea and also she was just as athletic as the great writer and caught the big fish right alon

Today: Journal, July 21, 2007

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Sex is a sad reason to be alone with someone.

The Sun Eaters

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And in the end, when there was nothing left and we all had come to look like whispers, we ate the sun.

A Blowhard Drops By

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So, I say, what is the answer? The answer to what? You know. The song by Bob Dylan. The answer is blowing in the wind. You’re the wind. So what’s the answer?

Shadow of a Bone

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...the shadowy Samantha sitting up in bed...

The Phosphorescent French Fry

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She's speaking again, this time in whispers. Her head is shrinking in on itself. If there is a way to save her I'm not aware of it.

Some Indian

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We had been drinking.

The First Soliloquy of the Interior Zombie

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But do come close enough for me to hear.

Across US Sullen Teens Dump Family for Olive Garden

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"That zit on your forehead just won't go away, will it, sweetie?" she adds as she brushes her daughter's bangs downward.

You Can't Always Get What You Want

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I was tired and lonesome when I checked into another insufferable, shop-worn Holiday Inn. It was the only motel around with the internet — dial up only — in that little jerkwater town, Notmuch, Alabama. It was too late for a nap, so I jumped in the shower,…

My Smelly Valentine

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He asked me if I was going to buy Valentine's for the office this year, and I shook my head. We were in the dollar store, February 13, and I could get a box of twenty kids' Valentines with last year's favourite cartoon…

I, Betty Crocker

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I was born at the age of 42. Some of you might regard that as a handicap, but at the time I assumed everyone was born fully grown in a corporate test kitchen. In fact, I still think of it as an advantage; like being born with a silver spoon in my hand.

Rattlesnake Pancakes

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I don't usually take bets, / but I took this one.

Hotel Khadijah

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"A prostitute of the Hotel Khadijah in Rahab fell in love with my father...."

Condos Dumping Lawyers for Paramilitary Death Squads

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“Honorable condominium association members,” the leader begins. “I apologize for not having a PowerPoint slide show tonight, but me and my muchachos travel light.”

How To Find Yourself (or a reasonable facsimile)

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While I had believed that the subject had been exhausted, that the bottomless pit of the individual navel gazer had been done to death, now here arrives How To Find Yourself to show that previous literature had only scratched the surface of the belly butt

Mating for Life

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Mari thinks that's all fine and fucking dandy.

Speak

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She can still be normal, says Momma, knowing my sister can’t hear, forgetting I can.

Infinite Penis

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He finds a beach ball and recreates humanity upon it. Kicking it down the shore he wonders how the little people must feel about each other. To place them on such a tiny globe almost seems unfair.

Our Valentine's Day Special (From The Law Offices of Paul Steven Stone)

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This year, instead of giving roses or candy for Valentine's Day, why not give something your spouse will never forget. A brand new divorce!

February 2012 Denver, COLORADO

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"You don't need the gun," Dean said. "Bring me a bottle of peroxide and some duct tape."

Spices

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In the tang of winter warm and summer cool,

The Fat Man's Third Wife

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They say it was like an elephant married to a dove. Imagine, me, a dove! Ridículo!

Stumbling Grace

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I'm not sure if my heart is breaking Or attacking Like an aged lovesick romantic with a faulty beat, I sense a valve needs replacing But only after the main artery has been sutured and made whole By a seasoned and skilled Midwest surgeon in a…

Life Before Kant

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I doused back three Buds in the time it took him to detest a variety of subjects including the naivety of quantum physics and pregnant women.

The Burglar's Golden Rule

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Undies before jewelry!