PDF

Infinite Penis


by Shawn Misener


      He finds a beach ball and recreates humanity upon it. Kicking it down the shore he wonders how the little people must feel about each other. To place them on such a tiny globe almost seems unfair.

      The only way to make himself real is to spawn others that believe in him. He sweats and watches the bouncing boobs of the women who gather around him. It's hard to restrain his erection.

      When his pants explode his penis is let loose with the force of a sonic boom. The women faint and his ball explodes into a million fluttering scraps. He weeps as the little people fall to the ground.

      It will take him years to reel in his infinite penis, which he must do carefully. He's too shaken. Nobody else should share the fate of his beach ball children.

Endcap