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Before I take on any client, I need to know why exactly you need the services of a professional wingman. It’s hard to admit to your failures, especially when it involves your penis.
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1296147
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The fuckers tumble out of the bathroom like clowns from a tiny car. The girl has these huge tits and dark red hair. She rushes past me, smelling like chocolate. A guy's behind her, holding onto the back of her jeans. He's not good looking enough to…
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129600
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Transhumanism has always had its malcontents usually derived from some philosophic contestation, but for all their thought experiments, somehow my present situation eluded them.
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129643
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The way I figure it, mom wasn't worth a shit. I'd cry when she hit me but she'd just keep pounding. When I was seven, she burned a hole in my back. It happened one day at the fair. We were walking around. She didn't have any money so all we could do was walk. I had…
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129611
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The white moon is dangling
by a thread tonight.
I close my eyes
and listen to it undress.
Your halo fell around your ankles
and you became see-through,
but there’s a vast gulf between being pretty,
and pretty dangerous.
Still, I’ve s
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1295114
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When were you flash frozen?
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129522
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Jack and Jane went up the hill.Give us a drink, said Jack. Here go, said Jane. They watched a bit of the city below, the city that was lit up by soft electrical lights. What say tonight Jane? Why so quiet? Many spirits are out Jack. They are all around. …
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1295138
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Humanity comes without a choice
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129563
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soap smells tangy, but/I wouldn’t eat it: scent and/nutrition diverge.
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129511
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I am naked in an upright glass box with water running through my hair and over my skin. I am in there when the old man who invited himself into our house for six long months (because no one had the nerve to tell him to leave) opens a door and stands…
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129500
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dove from the trenches, double-check
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129511
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1. Days of InnocenceFluorescent maggot men dance the flamenco.2. The Eyes of MedusaPythons and immobile pole dancers in grey body paint.3. GolgothaA drunken mechanical Christ grinds your bones to make his bread.4. Big Ape BollocksAlpha males slug it out in a cage made of…
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129553
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I came out of the Quick Stop and found her in the back seat of my ten-year-old Camry. I don’t know who she is, or why she chose my car. I do know she’s having a baby any minute now.
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129510
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The harsh lights of the 7th Ave. Local revealed dark circles that had remained hidden during Vivian’s performance.
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129510
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“What if every cloud you saw carried a bit of hope?” she said to the window, looking out at a rolling storm. There's something peaceful about stormy weather when you're inside. Stormy weather. It almost sounds quaint. “Well?” she said,…
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129500
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What can I say about the Internet It's one of the best inventions since the TV set It's a place you can do research and shop A place where you can sell everything from shoes to stock You can go to rooms and chat And meet some nice people or some that seem…
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129400
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Popular wisdom would have it that heroin addicts are some kind of cross between vampire menace and low-rent cartoon.
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129400
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the dark brown cloaked warden stands on his lofty perch
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129431
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In one section of the map C climbs a staircase.
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129441
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That was all it took. Thirty seconds.Half of a minute.30: He was standing with me on the corner of the street, 29: waiting for the crosswalk to say it was okay for us to make our way to the other side. 28: The red "do not walk" signal changed to the white "join us over…
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129401
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I remembered every noun and matching verb,
Simple sentences only, two words divided by a line,
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129400
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As Zoë says, “You and your musician friends drink in industrial quantities.”
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129470
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Who better to know the wiles of the fox than the vixen herself?
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129421
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Is death like standing in a room at night and turning off the lights? You would still hear your breathing. You hold your breath. Silence. Darkness. Yet you feel gravity, your feet on the floor. Then the air brushes your skin. Remove the air,…
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129443
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The brain had elected itself Judas, sleazy loud with silver jangling In this grand guignol of new and quickly old concussion Limbs roasted themselves to occult temperatures Yet remained whitely chilled under air that strove to rub, scrape, signify …
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129322
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The rain falls soft after a hard weekend.
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129330
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She turned on the television. The newscaster was her husband. She changed the channel. Her husband interviewing her husband. She changed the channel. A baseball game. Her husband pitched to her husband who popped a fly ball which was caught by her husband
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129333
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A strange man tapped my door and held up the shoes for me to see. “It is the Dork Shoe,” he said. I looked past him at his dusty station wagon filled with boxes. “I have your size right here.” I observed the halo of his gray hair as he…
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129320
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How we segued from exploring the wind to eating a nitwit sandwich.
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129221
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THERE ARE TWO PARTS. FROM PART ONE: (Later the police escort the students out, directing them to keep their hands in the air, as they file out into the parking lot. They wrap Mrs. Smedley in a blanket as she stares out blankly in shock. "How is Linda? Is
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