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Two of a Kind

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What was it about women that made them know these kinds of things about one another, about people, the way they came together, the future? Crater thought back to Dresden, the exchange student from Holland. She knew things like that.

Tomorrow in Tonga

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What would you do today if you knew your time was up

Elephantine

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After like forever I remembered Seth was there, too. He was still on the levee's edge, but had drawn his legs up and crossed them, Indian-style. All of a sudden he was laughing.

Going Bananas

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I haven’t made the headlines yet. Maybe I never will. In a city like this, it probably takes more than this to get the helicopters in the air.

A Young Girl's Passage

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"There's a dead mouse in the toilet!"

Bird In the House

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"Because of the way our society is structured, a lot of people have to climb hard to get to anywhere reasonable in their lives, losing fingernails and a sense of dignity on the way up."

How to Travel with your Demons (1)

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Someone's shaking powdered sugar on the tree limbs. Someone's turned out the lights. It's a beautiful morning.

Let me tell you one last story

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Let’s be honest, you were cheating on your girlfriend, and I would’ve slept with anyone

Seasonal Discord

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“I killed a man.” “Whaaattt???” I'd been meditating on the sun. I figured he was trying to jolt me awake.

The Fountain

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The man looked at him for a moment, as if he didn’t understand him, “Mr. Wallace, you have a genuine miracle in your bathroom. This isn’t something that just wraps up.”

The Chihuahua Cure

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It came from the animal shelter, seizing and shivering, with eyes almost bigger than its head. Eyes that followed Pearl like it couldn’t stuff the whole picture of her in its tiny skull.

Polly

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I taught Polly to turn on a flashlight with his nose. It became his favorite occupation and he'd sit for hours with the light between his paws, watching the things it lit—sometimes jumping up to lick the wall. He'd shine it on our daughter's…

Les Petites collines De Ma Cousine

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Les petites collines de ma cousine Vous savez, ma mère a eu peur du fait que je ne résiste plus. Elle avait mille fois raison : Mes quatre sœurs ont toutes rendu l'âme avant que…

A Felinist Critique of Macbeth

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Lady Macbeth goes around moaning “out, out damned spot,” when a well-placed lick would have solved the problem immediately, with no unnecessary and heavy-handed dialogue. Once again, clumsy work.

Things Left Unsaid

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I knew I was on the wrong bus, but jumping off was a death sentence. I was afraid, but by then I was used to that.

Flossie’s Bordello and Bar-B-Q Shack

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The women of Bixby, Texas, united in their frustration and general thirst for arson, cheered as Flossie’s Bordello and Bar-B-Q Shack burned to the ground.

The Imprint of Necessity

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I’ll tell you what I think, I think Their hopes of a brush with love Is what keeps the simple cricket Awake all night If you find a baby cricket on its back Fallen on the sidewalk Struggling with its legs In the air Help it to its fee

Baby Carrot

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In my choppings, I come across a tiny carrot amidst the baby carrots. The runt if you will.

Rattlesnake Pancakes

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I don't usually take bets, / but I took this one.

Sermon of Lilac

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The night was a lilac bowl of darkness

Beatnik Blonde

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everything plus zero stays the same

The Hamburger Story

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I didn’t like her. I like the name. You know I hate that name. I always thought you were funny. Maybe even more than you were mean.

Amber

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I am the marigold wheel no one can understand, the menace your grandfather warned you about. Yes, yes, that last phrase was overkill...

The Mating Habits of College Girls

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Jeremy and I are in bed tangled in the sheets, my head on his chest, and he’s playing with my hair, stroking it the way I like. He’s breathing heavy, my arm wrapped around his torso, and I’m smelling him and he smells sweet like he always does. Th

"One,Two,Three,Four,Five,and Six," said Seven to Zero Before Disappearing Over the Cliffs

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“I don't think of all the misery but of the beauty that still remains.” Anne Frank I know. It's not quite the fun little story you had wanted to be hearing from me so soon after the last sorrowful one took your breath…

The Boundary Line

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These things were indeed the wealth of our respective nations.

Bland, weak, spoiled, slaughtered

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Their wedding gift to us was a night out with them and tonight was the night. But, you see, Rali and Kate had so much more to offer us than we could ever think to register for. They were giving us an exclusive guide on how to live as an up and coming coup

Putting the Fun in Funeral

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The funeral was a blast. One helluva time. We all had the time of our lives. Well, all of us except Dominic. It pissed me off that Dominic didn’t have fun. After all, he was the center of attention. The whole day was about him, and we spared no expense

Merry-Go-Round

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“Stop!” I shouted. “I want to get off!” The toothy horses showed me the whites of their crazy eyes. “No, no”! they chorused as they whirled around and around and around.

A Nun Walks Into A Library...

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Library life is full of surprises.