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Why We're Going to Eat Uncle John's Suicide for Breakfast, Tomorrow

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[Party!]

Filth

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“Get ya hands outta there, ya filthy old cunt!” I look up, his distorted face hurling more abuse.

He Holds an Expired Visa and a Monday Grudge

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Somehow the world survives

The Beatle Suite:7 Beatle Inspired Poems

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I took 7 Beatle Song Titles and Made 7 Darryl Poems Out of Them"Some musicians heal ethnic groups. Some musicians heal nations. The Beatles healed an entire planet."--Joe Queenan"There was adventure,knowingness,love,and abundant charm.From any angle,they are the…

DEFILEMENT OUTSIDE OF HEAVEN, TWO MILES

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The road that passed through the swamp near where the cemetery stood, that is, the road that passed by the cemetery that stood near where the swamp lay—but no, that’s not the case, because that’s not the same road. If I’d been on THAT road—

Minnesota Menage

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I peel off my shorts and tee-shirt, step out of my shoes, and crawl into bed. She wakes up then. "Oh, my goodness," she says.

Doreen - II

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I had the distinct feeling she was telepathic. As that thought crossed my mind, she smiled broadly and returned my quizzical stare. It caught me off guard, wasn't what I expected.

Mice

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Short, but true. Damnit.

NOVEL EXCERPT: Jimmy Gollihue

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Jimmy Gollihue awoke to the howling of a bloodhound, a long voice from up the mountain, and the baying of the dog pulled a keening lament from his dream of the highway.

Clab's Craws

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I realized something must be terribly wrong.

Amoco Cadiz

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She'd liked the name of the tanker. The Amoco Cadiz.

Bootstraps

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I made my way quietly out back and sat in Helga’s whitewashed porch swing, listening to the first faint sounds of big band music drift out of Helga’s open windows and into the cooling summer air. The darkness was moving in slow from the east, interrup

hide the dildos

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her: what are you worried about? me: the dog sitter.

Out of the Loop

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Ed wants to watch the last half of the football game. His wife wants him to mow the lawn.

Tuesday, Before Noon

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It came up heads so he is going first. He puts on a condom and gets in

Duet for Two Instruments of Indefinite Pitch

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A full moon in the morning sky, the sun hasn't bothered to rise and why should it, see how unnecessary it is, left over from a sleepless night, it stayed there, in suspense, waiting to see what you could possibly get up to next. A patron saint for lost ca

excerpt from a forthcoming novel

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I wriggled in the bed and felt the sheets soaked with perspiration. My arms were lined with tape and tubing, needles pressed in veins. I reached for the cloth again and again, and every time they stopped me. The hands that came were cold and hard, urgent

Almighty Pink Slip

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I fired God today. He wasn't showing up for work, slept through meetings, wrote ambiguous memos and killed too many innocents. Things just weren't working out.

Begonia {part one}

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The sun was so upset that immediately he pulled his blanket over his face and cried out of worry. His blanket, of course was made of clouds and his tears made up the rain. The sun was very right to be frightened, as were the flowers to wither, for the Kin

A mostly true story about the Coca-Cola Museum

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At work I recommended someone go to the Coca-Cola Museum in Atlanta. I told you about recommending it to someone. “I always wanted to go back there,” I said. “You did? You never told me,” you said.

Rams, NFL's Smartest Team, Forget to Make Playoffs

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“I was looking for the review of the Alvin Ailey dance company when I noticed something in the sports pages,” says the 300-pound center. “All of a sudden it hit me–I should have been playing football."

Obituary

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Patrick Savage, who has died aged 29, was a poker player fast on his way to becoming a cult figure in the music scene.

Test Day

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“I need an ambulance, we found a baby in a ditch.”

Hands

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pressing my hands into the voice in the bed,

Unwanted Stories: A Public Service Advisory

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Unfinished, deeply flawed stories require the kind of handling you see in movies where a Virus That Will Doom Mankind is disposed of by scientists in hazmat suits.

Scooter and Skipper at the Roman Colosseum

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We make our way into the Colosseum–excuse me, the Prince Spaghetti Colosseum–and take in the beauty of Italy’s national pastime; sadistic cruelty to wacko religious cults.

hair

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A strange and unexpected shift has occurred.

Henry and the Hungry Hamper

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  Henry's had a messy day. He splashed, he jumped, he rolled and played. He wrote in books, dressed up the dog, And on the wall he drew a frog. He's wearing dinner, seconds too, And for dessert some fruity goo. It's come to live on…

Serial Killer

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Once Mom finally came to terms with the fact that my brother was gay, she became convinced he was a serial killer. “He has all the signs,” she told me as she trimmed my hair. “Signs?” I asked, watching her in the…

Tadpoles

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Whole frogs are/ too difficult.