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A Few Good Band Names

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Auto and the Grease-Pits Sugar Cube Full Frontal The Holy Grill Crazy Al and the Squirrels Talk Is Cheap Grilled Cheese Sandwich Cold Zippers Destiny Howl Epiphany Critter Cold Kneecaps Crepes Pulled Pork Baby Seals and the Club

Whirl

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Wanna,wanna, whoop de loop. Hold my baby, kiss my mom, dance the way I used to do. Desktops, blacktops, cut and paste, speed down hills, learn the rules, Sister Saint Marion, married to Christ. Sixteen, life-green, pink tights, Swan Lake, an…

She Called My Poem Nice

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“There is no future in art, you will not change lives with flowery words. Please don’t rock the boat”

Ballspenden

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Even if you're doing it together, there's no unity when everyone's dancing to their own tune.

After Prometheus

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His method is simple...

A Night In a String Of Long Nights

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Whatever innocence Michelle had brought to the game was long gone, even the part where she dreamed she was the star of a righteous, asskicking movie.

Thirteen Random Things I Learned About Jon Stewart From "Angry Optimist: The Life and Times of Jon Stewart."

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Jon Stewart factoids!

The Bedbugs

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Cockroaches in bed was the last straw. Alicia was sure she’d swallowed one in the middle of the night . . .

Hardware Store Tour

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The Plaza had a chess-board floor, green wood booths, and the lights stayed up. I might be combining a memory of Fitzie's in Binghamton. The Plaza felt like a preppy soda fountain with beer.

The Discovery of Infinity

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Infinity occurs as an afterthought, for discoverers like Columbus as for countries like America.

Privileged

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I could hide away in this tower But I am Rapunzel And I will let down my hair

Arcana Magi Pure Vol.5 - c.1

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Mayumi and Emi were in the spring’s together, center of the pool at shoulder depth. Emi stood in the center, letting its warm and clean air clear out her thoughts.

For Fathers Day 2014

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Divine guidance. That's why Dad used a blowtorch to set the jug on fire, its contents the “Devil's elixir.”

Beverly Abbey

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Downton Abbey and The Beverly Hillbillies. They're practically the same show.

Faceless

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The sting of a slap will be remembered, as will sex, or at least a fragment of it, such as the face of a man in your room who tied your hands with the belt of your plush terry bathrobe.

Göttwigg’s Fandango

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It is not unusual to see Göttwigg with his shirt on inside out.

Xs and Os

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Momma pointed out our paintings on the walls, the signs we had learned, but when Daddy saw our friends, their wheelchairs, braces on their legs, he left...

Off the Grid

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The slicing is easy. Blade barely touching skin, flesh separating into two clean parts. A breath, and blood fills in the space, an old friend materializing in the shadows. I am redolent with hope and desire. I can't stop thinking of how he excised himself from my…

No Alternative

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This story* is brought to you by

Did you ever kill someone?

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Well, yeah but no one that wasn't pointing a gun at me, mostly. I shot at a lot of people but there were only three times when I can honestly say I know that I blew someone away.

Hollywood Stars

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Your Uncle Howard and I listened to Dutch Reagan re broadcast big league baseball on WHO Radio when we were little. He'd call the play action off the wire complete with sound effects. The son of a bitch turned out to be a Republican...

Hard-to-Reach Places

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Jody wakes some days with pieces missing.

Something for Seniors

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For Sale: Clean Depends, Never Worn

The Human Resource

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I am a human resource, batteries not included

Four Sieges

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Nicole knows that Deirdre is winding up for the weekly pitch, practicing the line in her mind.

Passage

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She didn't want to let go of the crumpled tissue she had been holding all this time, as it is wrong to litter, but she finally did, and felt free. Released. Bad. Naughty. Almost orgasmic.

Size Times New Roman

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“I’m making a dress,” she said, feeding the pages through the sewing machine. He didn’t know how to answer. “Are those my books?”

If You Want To Work At Club Arseni

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I hev my girls shave.

Radical Middle-Aged Cake Acceptance

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Cake is not the enemy.

Happy Birthday Mr. Watterson, Wherever You Are!

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Bill Watterson isn't just the creator of the world's best comic strip. According to the book “Looking for Calvin and Hobbes,” a biography of the elusive and reclusive cartoonist, Watterson is also a world-class introvert. Watterson refuses to make…