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Okatooga Warhammer

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They looked like girl’s jeans. Matt held them against himself in the mirror. Not that girl’s jeans were a mark against them. Usually, girls had better jeans anyway. Matt took two of the biggest pairs out of the big chest in his grandmother’s back closet.

Side Effects

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When the medicine started to interrupt her sleep, she made elaborate breakfasts – sweet potato pancakes, crepes with homemade cream cheese filling, omelets with spinach and brie, hand-rolled croissants stuffed with bittersweet chocolate. It was in those e

How to Fuck Kanye West (Up the Ass) by Donald Trump

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[marbles] [blither-blather] [blarg]

Workingman

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He died in the ditch he dug.

Disposable

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He was a liability. I knew I had to ditch him.

You

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What is the meaning of you?

1.

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I follow what pulls me forward.

and Henry Rollins as Lydia Grant

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At this stage of the game you don't even matter enough to have an asshole.

Flight Path

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Those who love aluminum bellies and landing gear and ailerons... that ilk... settled at the western edge of of LAX 24R 6L and called the encampment Flight Path.

The Missing Years

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Andrew smiled at her while he pulled out his penis. He then held it between his fingers and tugged at it, stretching it much like a rubber band

The Agreement

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Our Irish tradition is rich in Yeats, drenched in Bushmills.

Pigeon Post

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“Monetising the mecosystem” Theobald blathered, “extend the value proposition, core competencies create cash rich commitment free conurbations…partnership models proliferate non essential services spawning new opportunity…” Peregrine tried to

Real

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That was the start of it, the vigils. Every night at the foot of the Gilt Spears a group of people congregated in a housing estate to look up at the stars. Housewives with working away husbands, fractious toddlers hanging upside down…

At the Jube

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I started walking around the Jube like any other sheep, lemming, or penguin: passing plate glass windows, one after another.

Hitting the Wall

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I tried to talk, but only / whispers slithered out.

Will Write For Crab Cakes

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By: Roz Warren (and Janet Golden)I'm a humor writer. My work appears in publications from The Funny Times to The New York Times. Janet is a history professor whose writing was confined to academic journals and the occasional op-ed. Driving back from the Jersey shore one…

The secret meaning of celebrity

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Unapproachable... for all that.

Good morning, Mr. Mourning!

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Now, I am getting angry! Now you want me depressed too! GET OUT! GET OUT!

Wounds & The People Who Poke Them

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My friend once told me about this island of trash in the Pacific. He said that if you threw a piece of trash in any body of water it would find its way there somehow.

Faker

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Jesus came strolling by in his sandally Jesus foot sandals.

Napomo 17: April 13 - 18

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Bones consolidate with age. The fleshy/ bits of body follow by wrinkling and/ spreading outward, appearing to expand.

Curse at Your Smoking Gun

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// opening act: van featuring balloon featuring drugs // headliner: lubv ya babe

Motel

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Brody was standing against the wall with one hand in his hip pocket, as if he was holding a gun. The motel was set in the undergrowth of several weedy small towns, but a flashing neon sign made it impossible to miss from the road. We used it as a safe hou

Everyone the Same, But Not At Once

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The surface temperature of the sun is 9,800 degrees Fahrenheit.

A Familiar Song of Love Song

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Take a bird down from the sky, just for a moment, it endears you to me. Find a raindrop in the pouring rain, it is a jewel beyond compare, unless you Are directly in possession of it. Drop it. There is a star that I cannot help seeing In the…

Appeasement

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No, I’m not at the junior high bus stop. I’m at the dining room table with my parents.

Channeling Dr. Gonzo

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“We’re on our way to gold country to find the American Dream.” No point in mentioning the huge prairie dogs, the ones swarming and screeching beneath the horses in their Hell’s Angel gear and Nixon masks.

A Cautionary Tale of Bike Swapping

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There is no Vinny’s Liquor store as far as she can tell. She begins to think there is something odd, that people are jerking her chain, sending her on a fruitless mission. It feels familiar, like sorority hell week. Maybe there is no liquor store at al

The Girl With the Dresden Blue Eyes

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Your girlfriend with the Dresden blue eyes with the sleek belly & gorgeous scars from ripping off Avenue A dealers has you on a leash of short-term amnesia. You can't recall the last time you got off from being trigger-happy inside her & you formed a…

Circumstance

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In a time of drought,/ the sound of rain is sweet/ and joyful music.