Most read stories

Low On the Hog

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Living lower on the hog than anticipated lower on the hog than previously expected lower on the hog than desired Living on the underside of the hog belly pretty much bouncing on the ground beneath the aforementioned hog belly Living clos

DRIVING WITH JON

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“There’s no real freedom in this world. But a car and the open road is close enough for government work.”

The Nude Pianist: A Novel: Chapter 37

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—Frank, how is your sex life?

1970

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deformed or retarded

yapping and laughing and living

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I can't take it bird by bird because I have neither.

She Waited for the other Shoe to Drop

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She Waited for the other Shoe to Drop

The Rug

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Marge bought the rug on-line.

bunk

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I bit her ear and / it was burnt toast

Date Night

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Content may contain ordinary, everyday, and all around average happenings.

A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte

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A woman is fishing in the Seine at the far left of the painting, while time is suspended and light remains. One man plays a trumpet. A half dozen people sit or walk under parasols. Couples stroll and children run or sit or stand beside their p

Quitting

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—It’s difficult to say, he said. I have mood swings. Women don’t like that. They become upset.

Bearing Witness

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I hold them to the light...

Supersymmetric: Almost but not quite

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As black as his socks with a hole in them she used to sew while watching. The octopus has three hearts you know. Yes, No and Maybe. As black as inkpots, inkjets, as black as typewriter ribbons and the Gutenberg press, as black as the ink of a trillion

A World of Hurt

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Cat fight. I rush outside and swinging my trusty broom I charge the rolling yowling ball of black fur.

" I Know Bernie, I Can Get You In."

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* Dedicated to Bernie MaddoffThere was a long line at the men's room.You know,when men reach a certain age,there is an urgencyto their frequent trips.So I saw an opportunityI said:" I know Bernie I can get you in.""Really?," they saidbut I played it coy"It ain't easyBernie…

In the Opinion of the 20th Century Velveeta

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The bananas are insured.

Monday

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The door shuts slowly to something that’s allegedly mine and it sits there and waits until I come home just like you.

A Conversation With a Ghost

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This must never get out in the press, for it would cause widespread panic. The priests would surround my house, not to mention the police and possibly the army. Castor Desayuno has come back from the dead!

How I Lost 1 lb Per Day

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Warning: Open and read before making any dumb-ass New Year's resolutions.

Things to Do while Waiting for the Toaster

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For you have waited. And waited and waited. And soon your slice of bread will be ready.

$5 K a Day

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We are all in big trouble. Here's some fiction to let your soul experience the beast.

Things I Learned But No Longer Believe

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Shakespeare had red hair / Van Gogh never painted a nude

A College Town

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Beside Dripping Glaciers

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We slept beside dripping glaciers people like us We were never meant to be housed contained, kept, petted, cleaned We could only be gutted You used us one time and threw us out people like us We sprouted the wings of desire by watchi

Cleavage

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"Dennis," she started "exactly what the fuck are you looking at?" "Your tits" I replied.

Ruptured, Weeps the Hole: The End (ELECTRIC DELIRIUM 10)

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She dips a toothpick in ink, running prick over paper, simply to prove herself wrong.

Time Travel Telephone

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And now, the weather. The Cloud Wranglers have roped three solid clouds this morning, preventing the clouds from raining iron bars onto Human Brain Storage Center #17.

Placeholders

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Everyone falls,

What If?

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“Can you adopt if you work for the circus?” I asked her

Free

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The print is not ideal, it's true.