Stories tagged humor

Margit's Best Friend

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The prosperity spilled down to the immigrants such as Ivar and his sister Klara's husband Axel, providing as much work as they wanted. The pay wasn't great, but with the double shifts, the wives could finally stay at home to see to their families.

THE LOVE DIET

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On the first day of my diet, I only cheated once. But I sort of made up for it by taking the stairs at work and parking far away from the entrance to J.C. Penney. I went to the mall to look at the sexy outfits I would buy as soon as I could get rid of

When Out West

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Eddie and Sid looked at each other, saw the dice from the mirror, hula girl on the dash, capri pants and shiny dacron tops on the bodies, bee-hives, smelled the gum. Sid leaned over to Rich and whispered “What are we, in a 10 year time-warp?”

Psychological Profile for "Joe"

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He boasts of administering regular beatings to his wife and claims that she enjoyed it.

I Met Her At Best Buy

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I met her at Best Buy. She caught my eye as I scanned through the Apple section of the store.

Inhabiting the Spectrum

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Whenever I don't feel confident about how I'm dressed or am threatened with the feeling I don't belong, I stand up straight and smile. It doesn't fool anyone of course, but at least I do scruffy social misfit with dignity.

From The Island Of Final Regrets

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A friend of mine recently died and went to Heaven, or so I innocently thought. It was only when I received a letter a month later postmarked “The Island of Final Regrets” that I realized he was still in transit.

two dudes talking

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“What about this shirt?” “I didn't know Gap had an ‘approaching middle age pimp' department.” “So… no?” “Yeah. No.” “Approaching middle age?” “So…” “So?” “Soooooo…”…

Hearts in Exurbia

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Silent Murf was largely toothless, and the gaze from his eyes diverged in opposing directions; his skinny arms were a fancywork of jailhouse tattoos and what appeared to be scabbed-over claw marks.

He Called It Life

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Somewhere in the suburbs, a man awoke to the quaking of his alarm clock next to his bed.

Like An Endless Rain

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Fate could have sent me any number of Sergeant-Detectives, but fate sent me one of Boston’s finest, Sergeant-Detective Sheila Magnuson. Aside from being a little undernourished Sheila Magnuson is possibly the world’s most beautiful Sergeant-Detective.

Desilu, Three Cameras

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Ricky imagines bending her over his conga, yanking that bushy dark ponytail like reins and ripping into her. He sits, watches, legs crossed, smoking a cigarette. He needs a dancer for the Jezebel number now that Connie is showing. This girl would make a f

Planet Crabby

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On Planet Crabby a boy met a girl and a girl met a boy but neither couple got anywhere because they dismissed their prospective partner as just plain too crabby. Alternative arrangements were unthinkable. This happened a number of times.

My Affair With Tiger

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Face it girls, you want to claw my eyes out, don’t you? Or whack me across my 36 DD’s with a golf club, am I right? Well don’t blame me if I’m young, gorgeous, full-breasted and obviously the cat’s meow.

A Disobedient Hand

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And so peace returned, harmony restored, I set out to achieve the highest limits of academic excellence. Presently, my nose began to itch.