Most discussed stories

Tax Tips From Tila Tequila, Professional Bisexual

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“We’re never going to get off the treadmill of paying ever-higher taxes," I said, "unless we get some creative suggestions from a professional bisexual tax advisor.”

Grey Zones

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There are these unspoken zones,where everybody is corrupt,and everybody is a con artist.Half the people are frauds,and the other half are phonies.Each person trying to outwit the next person,while everybody else tries to pick each others' pocket.Simultaneously and…

How to Have a Dinner Party

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sherbet is hard cash.

Night Flight

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I heard them calling my name. “Will passenger Karen Anderson please come to flight desk Six Fourteen? Flight 912 is ready for takeoff. This is your last call.” “Mario, did you hear that?” I asked. “We’re on the wrong plane!”

Big Al Dissects Literary Fiction since No One Else in the Bar could pronounce Aristotle

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“Well” I say. “What do you think about the dilemma of a guy who’s tortured by a history of incest and bondage?” “Depends” Says Al. “On who was cested and who was bonded.

Loettoer to the oEditor: Poet Frioendly Town?

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Aftoer roenting for 11 yoears, the ownoers are soelling. I livoe with a poet. Thoeroe aroe no availabloe roentals that will loet moe koeoep him. I thought Carmoel was known to be poet-frioendly. Studioes show that poets hoelp poeople livoe longoer. Ploeasoe oexcusoe…

No Lions or Tigers, Thank Goodness

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I scrambled back a bit and found my feet after untangling them from my trekking poles. Really should have dropped those when this all started. The bear lunged at me with his teeth and I just barely dodged to the left to avoid getting something bitten of

Until Again

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Methuselah. That’s what they call him, the regulars that ride my train. Other things too, but Methuselah is the one that sticks in my mind. It seems to fit. It’s not as cruel.

The Deli Worker

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This is the story of my friend, Gil

Into The Great Behind

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Harold’s a thinker, authors their plans. Last week he swiped six encrusted cans of Stroh’s from a faded cooler in his dad’s garage. He and LS guzzled each one in a chigger-weed patch behind the school gym, slurping and thumbing a stack of purloined

Points of Light on A Pearl Line 1

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Directions: Match the stanza to the Beat icon: A. William S. Burroughs B. Peter Orlovsky C. Jack Kerouac D. Carl Solomon E. Allen Ginsberg F. Neal Cassidy

Beggars Banquet

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When I was a boy and just out of seminary school, I went to a Doors concert and heard Jim Morrison sing his song ‘Soft Parade’ – it changed my life.

(6) Compatriots

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"It was here where he’d first seen the girl—Nan. Slender, with brown hair, pale skin, sitting on a bench, and reading from a pile of papers on her lap."

Very Short Stories And Pictures Of Ducks

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...the loving and very painful hurt of our daily sustenance

Creamy, Dreamy, Coppertone Cologne

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and live for that moment

Three Lullabies (after 'Ooh La La' by the Ditty Bops)

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she knows that's the natural place of a man, above everything, closest to god, eyes slowly filling with rain.

Son

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Trenches coated with man-gruel laced the earth.

Payments

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What it was for, didn’t matter. When Susan walked into Fred’s house every few weeks and start talking, he’d just nod and say, “Sure, I know how tough it is out there, baby.” Then they’d drink some wine and put on some music, and he’d give her a little mon

Weather

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I liked E first because she knew all the words to "Alice's Restaurant." Everybody knows "American Pie," but "Alice's," that's impressive. We used to cut class in high school and drive around listening to it, and I'd try to pretend I knew the words, but I never did, so…

Downloaded Cheats

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You are my intergalactic princess / The most beautiful in twelve systems

Famous Female Artist

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My dog Alfie and I would get in my van and go out at midnight for a doughnut. Or an éclair. A French cruller, to be exact. Sometimes we would get Blondie's Pizza on Telegraph Avenue near the Berkeley campus, if it got to be too lonely and restless at nigh

An Essay on People who Behave in a Slimy Manner

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Once upon a slime there was an Edenlike place that existed in outerspace all by itself. It was lonely, this little rock in space

They Take Those Most Willing to Endure, Write Them Off the Map, and Leave You to 'Resign' Yourself to What's Left

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[DO NOT READ BETWEEN THIS LINE ... CITIZEN!]

8 zero+1 scarring digits tic toc glossie phanein and coy constellations or blood by boards avadhoota where no divine mthrs stay

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I am seven and it is in one of those spring stretches where temperatures proceed enough to make walking acceptable if not amicable. Pop cans and chip bags once boasting glossy surfaces and daring hues now faded to match asphalt fields. Other bits of things…

Around Close

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You know moments like these. You know how your mother ruins them.

A Storm A-Brewin'

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"I'm just saying," the older man continues, "We oughta be ready in case she hits." "We'll be fine," the woman says. "We've weathered every storm that's ever come through here just fine."

Blow Me

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[BEEZLEBUB SAYS, "GO!"]

Bye-bye Love

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Barbie wore only her clear pink heels...

Armed

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The trucker saw his opportunity; he grabbed the waitress's arm and said, "Hello, arm!""Hello," said Mary Lou, "and goodbye heart!""Arrest me, darlin', this is love in the first degree. Tie me to a tree, make me write bad checks..."The customer seated at the front table had…

SMALL THINGS

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I held at my gut and immediately regretted laughing at Frank when he pulled the pocket-knife out on me. I doubled over and fell to the floor. "John, was a typer all this important?" Frank asked, knife in hand.