Most read stories

Lazarus argentatus

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They take the blue man out on a stretcher, stiff in cyanotic repose until the paramedics shake him. He sits bolt upright, startled, confused, indignant. ‘Lazarus?' I ask. ‘Argyria. Happens every fucking time he naps on the …

Homonyms Explicated

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right/rite: Your touch smooth as impulse/ Swaying my mind

Mercury Unbound

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~!~

Five Million Yen: Chapter 29

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-Ben, you mean you could get whacked for a couple of paintings? -Well, Gabe, there's more to it than a couple of paintings, but my lips are sealed.

Elemental

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It was in the last expulsion/explosion (theories differ) that we became OneWith. Tsunami. Seism. Zud. All matter cast out outcast came back like a gangster on crack. What did it think it was? Who do we think we are? It thinks we think it thinks…

To the Palace

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Less than a week ago, I was still a republican. It’s strange what an invitation for a job interview at the Palace does with your principles. I’m especially nervous because the interview’s late in the afternoon. I could go to the be

Loop

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At night, I watch TV shows with fictional characters who lead my life.

Visions

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colors dancing on metric vectors

deja not

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I haven't felt my soul leave my body

"The Game Is Rigged" (A 2nd Letter From Uncle Bernie)

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We used to have a saying: steal an old lady’s pocketbook and you’ll go to jail, steal her pension and you’ll go to the Ritz.

Wish for the Left Hand

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Hardly a soul could pin him for creating the vehemence that found a streamule to her pen if she wrote in cursive or a fanjet to her keyboard if she typed quickly and satisfyingly in print, employing eight fingers and two thumbs—

Improvisational

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This is not her death. This is absent-minded omniscience. This is impossible. And then again, the inside-out, implosion. And the hall was clogged with bodies; none of them hers, but who could be sure?

Me and Frisco on the Road

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I don't think I minded so much watching the trucks hit him, one breaking his spine with a decisive snap, and the other finishing the job by splitting his skull. I don't think I minded watching as much as I did watching those two boys poking around at his

Same As You

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What would people say about me? He was immoderately adrift. Maybe pathologically narcissistic. A shame he dumped Gina, the best he ever did. In essence, a man-child.

Little Shop of Altered Time

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“Time is inalterable. We can only offer an altered perception of time. And what better way to do that than by offering altered timepieces?

Luhvvz Lang-widge

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Th heeet frum mye skin on ers wus mehsidge eenuff.

Jeremy's Crane

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I saw magic for the first time when I was eight, on the day Jeremy Chendo showed me that paper cranes can fly.

no caps

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Fly n' Jelly

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Listening for a chain saw with one ear and to Todd and the trooper with the other, I’m trying to hustle up and finish my business - sweating in my coat and sweatshirt - and I think this: not so silly now, is it, this invisible or being able to fly choice?

To Walk Backwards

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Tom wasn’t crying. A few snowflakes, the first of the season, flittered down and landed on Elizabeth’s new headstone, christening it. Tom didn’t have his topcoat, and he never buttoned his suit. He tried not to shiver. Lynn lifted her face from Tom’s c

my future, maybe yours

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She went for the typewriter first.

Sacrament

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“Eat up, little brother” Jack called out from his end of the table. “The food will make your blood dance. It will be eager to mix with Helen’s.”

The Sadness That Can Be Gulliver’s Travels

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One day, he decided instead to be-pet them,

The Oxymoronic Life of a Nearly Dead Woman

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I could have a minor stroke.

At the Christmas Carol Bar

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I’ll take my Christmas carols neat-

Valedictory

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A speech that could not have been anything but earnestly prepared, sweated out under a hot light bulb while june bugs thumped against screens, delivered to fellow graduates, relatives, a state senator, the high school principle, and faculty representatives, all seated …

The Time Traveler

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The Time Traveler had been gone but a minute, when Filby, combing his fingers through his ginger hair, turned to the Psychologist and proclaimed, “That’s the last we shall see of him.”

Coconut Milk

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"The baby's head..it was so big. There were complications...I saw it all. They tried to get me out of the room but I saw it all. He split her apart like a coconut Norm! She was gone like that."

A Haiku In Spirit But Not In Form On the Fine Art of Sumo

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Two titans move opposite one another

TV Eye

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the world’s biggest poser fags