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I'm an alien, I'm a legal alien

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You can’t start living in The Netherlands just like that; you need to be registered first. Once an official has confirmed you’re the person you claim to be, you can start in a job. Once an employer has confirmed you’re employed, you can apply for yo

Greedy Pigs

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So I says,

The Animal Cracker Incident (Part 2)

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“I feel like my bones are melting.” Her arms are wrapped around her body tightly, like she’s trying to hold herself together. She’s shaking; I can hear it with every breath she takes.

Hexagon

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an ominous figure of fear and grace a ball moves back and forth

Snakes

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“Gaudy talking, ordination, high finance and politicking won’t save you. Moshaka zumbrala!” screamed Pastor Cleon Wrunk.

The colour! The power! The vision!

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... and photos of friends from former lives: the Wolfman; Drac; the Mummy; my ungrateful Son; even my gold-digging, coat-tailer ex-wife.

Another One Night Stand in L.A.

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This girl had burn scars on her body which hurt a little, to be touched, so we had to be real careful, gentle. I turned her over slowly so as not to shatter her. She wanted to be fucked, badly. But only one time. It was enough to be handled again like bef

Bananas

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Dog winged the monkey's gerdonderplonk just past ceremony. Winkle-wizzened water garglers awoke wanderjanked while apple-gated confederates slept on. Rusty pipe smack-down cancelled water lily gumbo's two o'clock and Patsy sang Crazy for the millionth time.…

Anxious Whittle Anxious

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Son, could you please step out of the car?

At Harbour

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Lulls, and the gulls, amid the tides and their tears (And I join their voices and my heart is run), Though each or neither takes no part in my fears, I join no hands with the beach or the years (And the ships slip near plus yon). Held handfast,…

Protagonist Unbound

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Protag noted that Gertrud’s brow was knotted with stress and rage, as if she’d been drinking too much coffee and reading the latest translation of Simone de Beauvoir.

Agape

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Every time Hector left his home he wondered if it was for the last time. It was Monday at 2:45, so he was standing in the bedroom near the tall mirror, staring into his dark eyes. In the past, she would lovingly help him dress with her tiny, perfect fingers. She…

the absolute pearl of existence

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I see it now. This is like the blind flash of the mind going off inside, where memory begins to make up its own stories. And the women are often drawn, painted, sung about, while the men are not, so often. What is it about us that they cannot resist loo

Soil.

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As individual as a shadow and the opposite of ‘stone faced’, Sidney Elvin “Ike” Liebowitz, with a clean-shaven face, well kempt hair and sideburns a quarter of an inch off of his ears, walks down a dirty and dimly lit street pondering sneakers.

John Nixon Cummin' in Matt Hogue.

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[FARCICAL STATUS ... Keep going to Ladd's, you fucking losers! #talesofatwentyFOURyearoldNOTHING]

The Road Trip Trilogy

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...It's my advice that this Fourth of July the Office of Homeland Security post the following instructions on your web site www.Ready.gov — people should act like my dog Lucy and just stay inside under the bed and tremble...

Dark Cave, No Candle

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Writing books is like raising children. You do your best, nurture them, discipline them, coddle them, feed them, patch up their injuries, sing to them, try to sell them, but no matter what you do, they are what they are.

living alone now

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Oh, yeah, that's me, the girl in the blue dress, the girl with short blond hair. Slight smile occasionally passing over her face, sitting at the café table, waiting patiently for the semi-famous rock star to show and buy a house. Brown and sea-green

Certainty

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All I know about the futureis that every one alwaysgets to exactly where they are.

Arcana Magi Pure - c.3

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Emi was cheerful and nice towards her classmates. It was like she saw a different person last night. Emi’s pupil-less red eyes frightened her, and the spell that she cast on her, that bump on the head still lingered.

Subways are Silver

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Subways are silver Taxis are yellow and Trees are green.

The Latest Rock Groups

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Luke Warm and the Sole Contenders. Door Odor Ant. Release My Pajamas! Behemoth Pterodactyls. Dragon Wagons. Mucked Up. The Gosspinator. Italian Film Director. Summer Dress. Unsolicited Advice. Golden Calf. The Gum-Chewin Gurus.…

Arcana Magi Zero - c.2

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It was so dark below, there was only flashlights weaving about and headlights pointing in one direction.

Bonfire of the Insanity

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You know when you’re in church and your older brother does something funny and you’re laughing and your dad grabs your elbow to make you shut up, but that’s even funnier still and you keep laughing and you know you shouldn’t be laughing because you’re in

Fun New Year's Traditions From Around the World

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When New Guinea's president was a student at UCLA he received an A- in organic chemistry after watching a Joan Rivers Informercial. Each year he tries to re-create the magic of that moment.

Unwritten

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You’re never really asleep. I am never awake. But as the darkness fades, I read. Your body tells my story.

The Grand Assembly of the RaZahn

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This anachronistic portion of the novel opens up a new and revelatory portion of the story which clarifies much of the mystery surrounding the developments.

Black Stag

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Around and down the curved slope of slippery embankment walked the young black male deer, lifting only one leg from each side, front-to-back then back-to-front, leaning to-and-aft, diagonally digging the heels of his alternate hooves into the quick caramel mud. …

Interview With a Pimp

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He went to the switchboard and rang one of the rooms. I moved away to a discreet distance so he could make his pitch in private, and soon he came back to the desk front. "He d-didn't like it much, b-but he said to s-send you up. Room 412."

Walking To Gibraltar, Chapter 15: In Which The Damage Is Contained

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He stood sopping in front of the mirror, dripping onto the limp puddle of clothing on the floor. He needed a haircut. He needed a shave. He needed to get rid of the two-fucking-inch white hair inside the helix of his right ear. He plucked it—and all the h