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One Night Stand Before Finals

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There was one girl from Ireland, with her thick Irish brogue, who came into my bedroom early on the morning before my final exam for my Master’s degree in the writing program at U.C Irvine. She knew I was so nervous about taking the exam that I hadn’t sle

Get More Protein From Your Music

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“Kids,” I say, commiserating with my partner Bink. “You can’t live with ‘em, but you can live without ‘em.”

Celes' Most Important Question

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This was a word Celes had not ever heard before. "Ethics?" "Ethics is… Well, let me see how to put this." He put down his fork for a moment and thought before continuing. "Ethics is the study of the form of what is right and what is wrong."

Flight

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They’re friends, him and Sissy and Raul, you know, and live upstairs from Asa and he went up there. He kept texting me saying, B here all night, follow u 2 airport. Yelled down through the floor. Real crazy shit.

Fried Architecture

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In the morning that same girl I’d seen gave me a tangerine...

Women With Colds and the Men Who Love Them

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“This is when things pick up with the ‘stuffies,’” says Sergeant Jim Hampy of the Vice Squad. “They lie low during the summer, then come back when cold and flu season starts.”

Of a Friend Whose Brother Died Young

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There was no logic to the thing; he’d left to drive his girl around. She had lived and he had died.

Sidewalk Opera

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She is left feeling like she has missed a stop, that she's at the last stop, that she's somewhere she wasn't meant to be.

3 Briefs

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Everything is on Time’s menu

I Heard You Like the Back Seat Too, Honey: Song

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They met at a bar They didn’t get far They went to her car Then back to the bar He played guitar She was a rock star They met at a bar They didn’t get far Well, I heard you liked the back seat too, Honey I heard that you liked to h

Do You Ever Really?

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The pavement was so hot, it burned the souls of my feet. I really thought they would blister, but they rarely did. I would try to walk on the grass, between driveways. Carrying that large bulky box. I would hear the the slap, slap, slap, of some of the other…

The Great Dying, Pt. 2

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"Great! Great. I got your message . . . yeah, it’s a little long. It’s 140 *words*, not characters . . . "

Nope

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Can't cope.

Synthetic Terror

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When I wake up, I am almost drowning in a sea of styrofoam.

Home Movie

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One hand holds the string-like railing; the other holds a bright silver toaster.

Galactic Bow Shock Romance

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Somewhere outside of the future I am seeing Weinberg, the duplicate failed mimeographed onto the front of ourselvescompromised composite grown from a codependent blastocyte talking to the boxes on the edge of tomorrow, collectiblecrystal lined folliclesharvested at the peak…

My Girl

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I like you,But I don'tLove youAnd that bitchDon't love youEitherWhy don't you loveMe?I only love my sonWhat do you hate About me?I hate your nervousnessLack of confidence,I hate your glasses,U asked too many QuestionsReally?Yeah, reallyWhat do like about me?I like…

Ice Cream

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"Great jog today," he said, "But the entire length of the run I'm thinking about ice cream and how good that is going to feel."

Spiritual Awareness

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Amir was a ghost, and he was terrible at it. No one had taught him how to be a ghost. There was no orientation, no welcome packet, no handbook. Ghosts started in limbo with only a name, and nothing else.

The Transportation of Hens

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Sixteen hundred hens / suffocated / during the collection

Never Sacrifice Yourself

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No matter how many times flies land on butter they will never become butterflies

Hygga

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Hygga was on the French news tonight. Hygga is big in France. And Scandinavia, of course. I'd never heard of it. Hygga comes from a Danish word meaning “to give courage, comfort, joy.” It stems from hyggia, which means to think in Old Norse, and is related to…

One-Nighter without a Stand, Even

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She lay down sideways on the couch with her large breasts spilled out toward my face, as I sat cross-legged on the floor, so that they were more or less right there in my face, and well, you pay attention when tits are hanging out in the open like that. S

eritis sicut deus

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—but neither Lenin’s serenity nor Voron’s could last for long!

Peeping to See if Spring has Sprung

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as if someone had spilled a bag of perfect diamonds on the world.

Loop

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Everywhere fear binds the elements

The Last Remaining

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Barry Gibb, the last remaining brother of the trio to make up the once popular disco band, the Bee Gees, comes out for his encore, to sing a cappella, “Stayin' Alive.”

my own image breaking and falling

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What went racing through my mind as Lynda was telling me about the farmer she was seeing out in Western Illinois with his 12 inch dick? She was only 5’2”. “It’s so big I can barely get it all in me,” she said, with her mouth part way open. That old look

Christmas Eve

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It was Christmas Eve. Time for the ghost to visit. Just one ghost in this story. The ghost of a Christmas past. Just one Christmas for just one ghost.He looked out the window. Under the distant streetlight the snow was falling. He turned on his porch light. …

True Story, Every Word

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So, I see this is story one-upmanship now. You think you’ve got stories! Here’s one for the books. Here goes! In 1968 I had a day job as a payroll clerk at the Kroger Company, but, to maintain my glamorous lifestyle and my impressive efficiency ap