“Have I told you this one before?” I can’t think of one he hasn’t told me, but saying so won’t stop him. I fire up the FreeCell game, put the phone on speaker, and pour a tumbler of chardonnay.

No, no mother’s tenderness: she shows no sign of that … Do you know that she has them make their own bed? No, not the girl: the boys too! Yes, the boys. She humiliates them.

My grandfather was ninety three. My mother was sixty three. I was thirty three. My daughter had just turned three. Our ages were all lined up like the beauty marks on Snow White in the Donald Barthelme version of the story.

...he was suddenly and hazily relieved that he had something in Persepolis and blue agave plants to talk to her about.

A man and a woman argued over the size of the quake. They were sitting on the floor like Tweedledum and Tweedledee.

I'm ten.

We are our own pathogens.

“I'll have the Ribeye cooked medium rare,” says Bill, who looks over at Julia, blonde hair and disarming smile, and he thinks that she's not bad for a blind date. He doesn't like the way she butters her roll, however, and it agitates him that she spreads…

I don't have time

It was possible, she realized, to hope through hopelessness.

‘what’s the hassle kiddo, chopping meat is fun, come here and listen to the music of the chop, the sound of steel ripping through air, slicing through flesh and hitting wood, poetry I say’.

“Is that an erect annual plant in your codpiece, Mr. Flax, or are you just glad to see me?”

They clog the skimmer basket/ and fill the small Polaris bag.

“What do you want for Father's Day?” she asks. “Sex,” he says, his mouth curling at the corners, “and a bottle of Shiraz.” …

I’m just living in my RV Guess my parking karma won Got some pigeons for my pets Cause I’m sorta on the run I’m just living in my RV And I’m not the only one But I’m getting kinda bummed Cause I miss my little hon Tried to kick my gambl