1844 2 1
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It’s late July, and I’ve just been given the assignment to cover Paganfoil’s ‘Warbird’ tour. To tell you the truth, I really loathe this assignment. I never, ever, EVER cared for hard rock or heavy metal or whatever they’re calling it this dec
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140531
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Today is my birthday. Well, my assembly date, anyway.
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151621
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It happened right after I had taken my Uzi to work, retrieved it from my Brooks Brothers briefcase, and fired it upon my desk and its assorted discontents, their paper lives bunched together by clips and notary stamps of approval, now set flying and free. I then walked into…
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166750
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I like to think of my poetry as fungus, sprouting out of the dank and fertile soil of my imagination.
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169741
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I am a dog – four legs, a tail, a carefree enough manner, I do this, I do that, get into fights, sniff the ground and so on
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113921
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“Good to see you, old man,” Greg said. He was like that, an investment banker, a latter-day Tom Buchanan without the polo ponies, self-consciously fusty.
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173310
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It wasn't until about 2:30 that my hairpiece began mauling small children.
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96941
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And there was Kathi R in the summer of 1969. She was from Wheaton. We had tons of unprotected sex that summer. She was short, almost no breasts, but man, she could reach down behind me somehow and grab my balls at precisely the right moment, and bam, ba
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135541
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"I am lying on my back and am confused."
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141840
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“I’m making a dress,” she said, feeding the pages through the sewing machine.
He didn’t know how to answer. “Are those my books?”
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72221
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Together they explore availabilities
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202421
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Jimmy Gollihue awoke to the howling of a bloodhound ...
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104721
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At one time it appeared that
Everyone was walking their own angel
On a leash, but
Now we're not that sure at all
And it could come out in song
That it might really be the angels
Who’ve been walking us
All along
All this broken glass
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111412
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I dig with no light to guide the aim of my shovel but the stars peeking through the trees which are fuller now then when you went away.
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25821
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123641
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Tree full of dimes and dollars
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86131
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It was a stupid thing, but one I'd gotten away with before. My bagel was stuck in the toaster, and I probed a knife down into the slot without unplugging the appliance. BAP!—sparks and smoke, and before I knew it, I was dead.
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138321
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Are you a hostile person who gets into trouble when you express your anger? Would you like to annoy the hell out of people and get away with it?
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237221
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At first I thought maybe I was dreaming, or hallucinating from the lack of sleep and a high altitude. I peered out of the small window and thought I saw a man walking stark naked along a path maybe twenty feet from my trailer. He walked briskly into a one
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135341
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It's come down to this: you're a grown man afraid to face his own son. For the past few years there has been tension;…
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131112
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suddenly she blurts out: “You are vulgar.” There is actually no perfect translation to it. “Bastos ka.” She meant I was vulgar, but also disgusting, distasteful, offensive, rude, salacious, obnoxious…
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237841
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The Chicago River is an artery of great renown in the history of the city, and it connects the lower waterways that lead to the town of Lockport and beyond. Near the old neighborhood where I used to live, the river divides the district, from Chinatown, do
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165311
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I know it was the ceremonial magician who talked you into it. I know it was supposedly to be what the Enochean Angels needed to come into the vortex and into the world, make it all balanced on all four sides, four elements, so that when the world ended, t
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152440
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So ya think you’re a writer? First of all, shut up. No, seriously, the very first thing you need to do, this very instant, is to just shut your mouth and take a seat.
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110270
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Jessica's face was so close to mine I had to focus on her left eyeball to keep my eyes from crossing.
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111731
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the Tate Modern is like a dungeon!
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150241
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"Now, here daddy was on the back porch at night talking with some man about leaving."
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123821
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I look as sympathetic as I can, under the circumstance, which is entirely unsympathetic.
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145770
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I heard this story from my grandmother who heard it from her grandmother who heard it from an uncle, who was a monkey.
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93631
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I didn’t know how to find the gold-capped ocean. How was I supposed to know where it was? I only knew you did not want or expect me to follow you there, where the orifice to everything withers, including my heart. Openings from the rivers drying in the
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