880 7 8
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My other brother, Mike, has been camping out with the Carter boys down the street. For breakfast, he had beans, straight out of a can, and they were the best thing he ever ate.
“These are the best,” he told them.
“The best beans?” Joe, t
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69558
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But you know what? You give yourself a fall back plan, you fall back. Not me. I am shooting for the stars and rising high. Next week, I start filming my first feature film. I get to play Tommy Lee Jones’ sexy little stepdaughter. Me and Tommy are g
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228279
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It’s Leap Year and my school is observing Sadie Hawkins Day, which means the sixth-graders have a dance where the girls ask the boys to dance and the rest of us get to dress up like hillbillies.
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18172115
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I had time to kill. I got on the merry-go-round, letting it go slow, thinking of starting blocks, how I might push off them.
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11803525
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Their mother never teaches them to wipe front to back or to brush their teeth before bed.
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138963
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This happened to me on Friday, May 3, 2002 in North Austin on the corner of North Lamar and Mulberry Street.
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89283
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I just like puppies, and slapping people.
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105045
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It’s true enough my status as honorary male has come in handy in my profession, but I never considered matters of the flesh. I feel a surge of warmth between my thighs as if a cock is dangling there, thick and florid. The sensation is oddly exciting.
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89441
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I'm delighted to report that I've come up with my own school of thought. It's called, "Dress Like a Cat Until You Get What You Want."
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21041817
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Sex when you’re pregnant
Is like sex when you aren’t
Pregnant, but with extra people.
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8372013
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"For God's sake," my mother said. "There could be anthrax in the candy."
My mother worried about me going out on Halloween.
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65533
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salmon
maple syrup
horseradish
smoke detector
the list read, scrawled in purple marker on the refrigerator door.
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11522121
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Theresa stopped speaking to me because I ate cows. This made things simple. There was no conversation.
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1406910
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I know I'm supposed to admire some girl drummer like Moe Tucker or Mrs. Karash, that would be more...
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8051110
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"I looked at this skinny, little female child, Meadow Simms. It wasn't only that she was small. Meadow Simms didn't look like other children. Her parents were hippies."
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26113120
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It’s never good to get arrested on an empty stomach.
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25631912
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It was a sore molar that was giving me trouble, on the bottom right. The dentist, about whose adulterous affairs everybody in the neighborhood knew and whispered about, ts-ts-ts'ed me and murmured "decay" before pulling out the drill.
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16372214
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I used to score girls by taking them on a ride past Frauenstein, up on a hill where you could see the trees, the whole lot of them sparkling white and pink in the breeze.
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