1311 2 1
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I woke up when the smoke alarm insisted. Either the curtains were on fire or I hadn't changed the battery.
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156231
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"On the podium at Pride, he owned that he'd loved taking his children to playgroup as he got to ogle all the breast-feeding mothers. "
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126320
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You welcome the new girl by putting a message on her back. I breathe harder until she pops or until you ask me what I’ve seen or until you see my hand turn into a fist.
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163820
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He slumped forward, drooling into his lap.
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208411
|
Who knows how long I have been crouched here, tied down by kelp and thin vines, trading laments with animals? They all look terrified.
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136501
|
“Hi, I'm Mike, and I don't wanna work ... Wanna play foos?”
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126021
|
This is a call to burn down the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum. It is everything wrong with our culture boiled down to one location. Ground Zero of hypocrisy. The spot where the very spirit of rebellion has been stolen by corporate America.
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193430
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The first photo above shows plainly: five children dressed in suits and dresses. There are three girls. Each girl wears a yellow sundress with chiffon ribbons. The boys have been terrorizing them--the girls, not the dresses.
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124630
|
I might have avoided all of this trouble if. . .
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75921
|
He wore a jacket with just
a letter; by this conspicuous reserve
he hoped to show the others it didn’t matter what you did
last year, only who you hit in the here and now, and how hard.
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78140
|
I worked for Century 21 and wore a mustard-colored blazer with a crest and a tie and plaid mini-skirt like a little schoolgirl and it would turn on the husbands. It made them unusually horny. I purposely wore white bobby socks. They would corner me in t
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121521
|
Breaking News: Noted local writer and very minor celebrity Paul Steven Stone joined a growing list of talentless wannabes to bare skin and a hint of nipple in a shameless attempt to draw attention to his current blog posting. When asked how far he would g
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115521
|
Doreen takes Butchie’s hand, steadies it in the can opener, counts “One-two-three”–and slams the chrome handle down.
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128311
|
There’s a room
Full of white
And it smells
Like bleach and
Iron
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110031
|
I dreamed I might one day become the numero uno tango singer in Boston.
|
207111
|
"How did you know he was a nobody if you didn't look at him, eh? Did you raise your eyes and look him in the face? Are you my wife or a whore?"
|
121111
|
Remain in repose, a little longer.
|
114321
|
I repeated your name like a mantra
/ and vomited black bile in the sink.
/ Some Buddhist monk told me
/ if I recite it ten thousand times
/ you will be mine.
|
122811
|
Next morning the thought crosses my mind of snapping Mom’s neck, making sure she’s dead, and then running down to the sea to drown myself.
|
152430
|
my molars are dancing, tekka-tekking to the strung-out paint can groove of my heart.
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130611
|
Liz lies in bed next to a stranger. He is snoring softly, and she turns her head toward him, looking at his eyelids flutter as he enters REM sleep. He stirs and rolls over on his side away from her. As he does so, he pulls part of the comforter with him, exposing her…
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147711
|
This morning, my band mates discussed their relationship deal breakers.
|
115750
|
I remember seeing five young losers standing outside this bar, smoking cigarettes in their baggy shorts and flip-flops, giving the occasional high-fives. They weren’t even eating their calzone, and I was getting upset about it. (I hadn’t eaten the whole
|
98611
|
They met at a bar
They didn’t get far
They went to her car
Then back to the bar
He played guitar
She was a rock star
They met at a bar
They didn’t get far
Well, I heard you liked the back seat too, Honey
I heard that you liked to h
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140021
|
My third Rule of Success—and I may not have these in exactly the right order–is always get a pre-nup!
|
133521
|
|
147611
|
I like babies and little kids, more than some people but goddamn, children's laughter out of nowhere (in the night, when you're not expecting it) is creepy. I don't like slugs smeared like nightmare goo on my summer-bare feet, I could do without them in …
|
188111
|
Almost 24 hours ago in Pakistan, Osama Bin Laden was sleeping just as he had slept every night for the hundreds of days prior; comfortable in a million dollar compound with his son and advisors around him...
|
153000
|
"Oh — what is this 'work' thing the philosophers speak of" sort of thing.
|
121050
|
The banality of his own state of boredom, a luxury to be satiated with violence, to hack with an axe the exposed neck of his friend.
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