959 2 1
|
Doreen takes Butchie’s hand, steadies it in the can opener, counts “One-two-three”–and slams the chrome handle down.
|
103911
|
There’s a room
Full of white
And it smells
Like bleach and
Iron
|
91131
|
I dreamed I might one day become the numero uno tango singer in Boston.
|
169711
|
"How did you know he was a nobody if you didn't look at him, eh? Did you raise your eyes and look him in the face? Are you my wife or a whore?"
|
100311
|
Remain in repose, a little longer.
|
94221
|
I repeated your name like a mantra
/ and vomited black bile in the sink.
/ Some Buddhist monk told me
/ if I recite it ten thousand times
/ you will be mine.
|
101411
|
Next morning the thought crosses my mind of snapping Mom’s neck, making sure she’s dead, and then running down to the sea to drown myself.
|
125930
|
my molars are dancing, tekka-tekking to the strung-out paint can groove of my heart.
|
111911
|
Liz lies in bed next to a stranger. He is snoring softly, and she turns her head toward him, looking at his eyelids flutter as he enters REM sleep. He stirs and rolls over on his side away from her. As he does so, he pulls part of the comforter with him, exposing her…
|
121811
|
This morning, my band mates discussed their relationship deal breakers.
|
89750
|
I remember seeing five young losers standing outside this bar, smoking cigarettes in their baggy shorts and flip-flops, giving the occasional high-fives. They weren’t even eating their calzone, and I was getting upset about it. (I hadn’t eaten the whole
|
74011
|
They met at a bar
They didn’t get far
They went to her car
Then back to the bar
He played guitar
She was a rock star
They met at a bar
They didn’t get far
Well, I heard you liked the back seat too, Honey
I heard that you liked to h
|
122921
|
My third Rule of Success—and I may not have these in exactly the right order–is always get a pre-nup!
|
111821
|
|
114911
|
I like babies and little kids, more than some people but goddamn, children's laughter out of nowhere (in the night, when you're not expecting it) is creepy. I don't like slugs smeared like nightmare goo on my summer-bare feet, I could do without them in …
|
153011
|
Almost 24 hours ago in Pakistan, Osama Bin Laden was sleeping just as he had slept every night for the hundreds of days prior; comfortable in a million dollar compound with his son and advisors around him...
|
153000
|
"Oh — what is this 'work' thing the philosophers speak of" sort of thing.
|
98850
|
The banality of his own state of boredom, a luxury to be satiated with violence, to hack with an axe the exposed neck of his friend.
|
119720
|
Her gaunt arms softly rose, sweeping in front of her with movements that were hesitant at first but, as the music that only she could hear took her in its grip, became graceful and assured.
|
89820
|
And then, like all those nights before, she just fell asleep seducing me.
|
110921
|
“He didn’t finish ‘The Witchcraft of Salem Village,’” Scooter says, tattling on his little brother. I’m projecting him to be a first-round draft pick by the National Security Agency in about ten years.
|
180320
|
Kelly looked at her screen. Did she really just type that? Is she really going that cliche? Apparently so. She sighed. "Well I can't erase it for fear of losing words so I might as well just go with it."
|
71450
|
Call me anything but Ishmael.
Call me Enamel.
|
121121
|
The supervisor, sensing the fear in me, pats my hand and says "Never you mind! This is normal in the tomato. Every few days we rile up, make sauce, and regrow again. Have you ever been in spaghetti sauce before?"
|
100520
|
I don’t understand what happened. I keep pushing your buttons but you won’t do anything. You just lie there, cold and dead, staring back at me without any light and I feel like I’m going to cry.
|
98620
|
I have one, but I want another,
A little greedy perhaps.
She's my obsession, my indiscretion,
My little judgment lapse.
|
70911
|
There I saw a woman with dyed long red hair
Dressed all in furs and a short tight skirt
Way too young for her age
And she was banging a tampon on her leg
At the performance of Ramblin Jack Eliot
And no one got up to throw red wine on her
Ful
|
99730
|
It began with the waffles, well first there were the potholders, but really the problem was the waffles. I don't even think she knew she was making waffles; much less that she had lost her potholders in the trash can the day before. But nonetheless the real issue here was…
|
160611
|
This is the story of my friend, Gil
|
100121
|
A ten-ton bus with ill-manners going slow
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