952 3 0
|
After he closed the door, Harry stared at the box for a long time before picking it up. I know what it is and I know what it means. Bloody hell. And at Christmas of all times.
|
124222
|
I'm living where I've always lived, in Georgia.
|
22131610
|
I’m practically naked; coral sundress, very damp panties, black with lace insets. I know I still smell like pussy.
|
175511
|
[CAUTION: IF YOU ARE UNDULY "FIXATED" ON GOD, AMERICA, MOM, APPLE PIE, AND/OR BASEBALL ... YOU MAY WANT TO AVERT YOUR EYES!]
|
45741
|
Graduates, I've seen the future of this world and it has had part of its brain removed.
|
99441
|
Tomorrow we will eat it in anger.
|
100210
|
Ok, ok, so I concede
some answers are enough to make you cry or laugh yourself to death.
|
91100
|
I look at her
really look
we both know her time is fading
"I'm just sad that you won't be there."
|
132300
|
This summer they had reached their fifth anniversary, the landmark they’d dubbed the Bacchanal year. Instead of exchanging gifts made of wood, they’d bought expensive wines and champagnes and emancipated their bodies of clothing for two straight days. The
|
105600
|
It's not actually about blow jobs, sex, or coitus of any kind. You probably won't like it.
|
78500
|
|
89200
|
When Prince Rainier III asked an expert whether there was a literature of Monaco, her research produced only a suggestive ode to a fig and a poem about a fart.
|
124584
|
Her purse still hangs on the knob by the door, and seeing it is all that keeps Josh from freaking out because he knows she can’t go too far or too long without her purse.
|
99511
|
Bullets and cars can kill in the cityThe weather doesn't feel rightIt was hot yesterday.And has now gotten coolerThe wind blows heavy,And it's rainingThe sky has turned greenAs people sit down to hearThe news reports on the radioThe tornado might hit us,Everyone seems to…
|
59340
|
With his toga thrown over one shoulder because it was so hot out which has led to various and sundry theories of the naked centurions riding on horses in this manner through some unimaginable desert on a long march or even along the banks…
|
116932
|
while you peed on that little old lady's begonias
|
161053
|
When farming started in September, I thought of gambling, of my childhood best friend’s marriage ruined due to gambling, and of farming as a trope for living in the Midwest.
|
74841
|
Last night the thesaurus exploded. Don’t ask how. It just did. Exploded. Burst. Blew up. Flew into pieces. Discharged.
|
122940
|
“Well, aren’t you the cutest thing?”
Shelly looked around for the source of the line and one of the better looking bar flies met her gaze. He wore a faded t-shirt with a swoosh graphic that read ‘Just Do Me‘. True to its mystical nature, her indefatigabl
|
689117
|
Sometimes all that’s/
left is pissing
|
90632
|
They called him Camel because of his humped back.
|
71111
|
|
1190107
|
The Tea Party member was married but cuter. He worked as a caulker, a tub and basin man.
|
89941
|
You will know the country for fences, for feces, for cows, or,
You will know the country for the smell of hay and manure blowing over the hills to you.
|
93201
|
The end of love is a rusty barbed-wire fence.
|
1553127
|
Another thing about Dysthymia is how I get locked into a thought, a needle in a record of a song I can’t get out of my head, a song that drives me crazy until I hear it again, until I play it just the amount of times to where my brain is satisfied.
|
126862
|
You master their secrets. Mirror adjusters... Air conditioning knobs... Fuel door releases... Changing their satellites to Mojo Nixon. But you never really know them.
|
14161310
|
I see my siblings once a year when we all show up, as if required by law, to eat Thanksgiving dinner. It is apparent with every bite how much they hate each other.
|
105420
|
The sun is coming up and the work day has already begun.
|
136574
|
I married a penguin. Her waddle made for a scenic view.
|
