Stories tagged advice

Advice to Horror Girl Victims

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leave a trail of potential weapons dropped from your shaking hands. you must always make it easy for him to follow.

Selfish Success

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I wear my gun so it shows, so everyone knows.

Captains of Industry

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Renee said, "I have actually slept with a number of Captains of Industry and would rate them, overall, deficient in skills."

Capitalism in the electronic age

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Then I would say to my new friends, “My God, look at all the weight you’ve lost.” Even when they hadn’t lost any. Even when they were fatter than before.

Press Star You Got Options

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think of some time you really had fun; rubber tire pendulum, hung above the swimming hole

Dear Corporate Security (Part I)

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The scarecrow is you and the tin man is everyone who ever told you not to try any harder. There is no lion because we shot and ate him for breakfast two weeks ago with a side of watermelon and some orange juice. The only thing that you can count on is tha

Lightning Box

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eat the marshmallows, fuck the cereal

Chop Your Own Firewood and Learn To Juggle: Advice I'm Going To Ignore From "Life's Little Instruction Book"

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"Life's Little Instruction Book." There are some words of wisdom here that I plan to ignore.

How To Write a Poem

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an EZ How to Guide in 50 simple steps

Zen and the Art of Enjoying the Last Laugh

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What doesn't kill you gives you great material.


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life, bro/bra

How to Be the Most Hated Person on BART (London Tube, Tokyo Bullet, or Any Public Transit)

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The daily slog on public transit is a battlefield. Tensions are often higher than a presidential debate, but throw a wrench into the gears (or a tree branch onto the tracks) with any “severe delay,” and add in one or more of the below faux pas, and we’re