Stories tagged humour

Swashbuckling in the Dark: Chapter One

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I immediately jumped from my stool and knelt to help clean it up, glad to have any distraction from the strained conversation. He was at my side in the same moment, using a cloth to soak up the spilled ink. I went for the compass at the same time he did.

I May be Dried Up -- But I can Make You Breakfast in the Morning

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Our dinner was over and we regretfully had to leave the restaurant. She leaves with enough shopping money for a few weeks. He, getting the rough end of the deal, has charged more money to his credit card at 19% plus cash withdrawal fees. So I ask myself

Every Kid

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Glaucoma can be a wonderful ally. Aziz-un-nisa saddled her steel chair in yards of pashmina wool, wickered navy and brown, waiting for him to step into the room. Goodbyes rehearsed, she sensed it was showtime. Glaucoma wouldn’t lose this afternoon.

Spiders

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Ten am, and the piledriver behind Rhys's eyes shows no sign of mercy. Beyond the safety glass, caverns of empty air tumble down and out to where the edge of the city is lost in the murk. The figures on the screen pulse and phase with the hideous internal rhythm of his…

Sugared. Spiced. Salted.

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They continued sitting by the fake oasis, drinking single malt, eating soy crackers and chatting about the quality of escorts in glitzy glamping resorts. The Paring happened on number three. Just as the gold leafed chocolate fondant oozed decadent Bolivia

Stillness

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You were sitting on dark leather meringue, wearing slit ivy, epilated thighs sliding through, roots showing beneath your anaemic skin, fighting with the pale bluegreen of your veins. Quills extended from your left hand, bent about 10.2 degrees or so.