Stories tagged zoo

Taunting the Tiger

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I was headed back inside my den since these creeps just wouldn’t stop and thought they were the most hilarious creatures on the face of the earth, and I was afraid, to be honest, that one of their missiles might hit me in the eye. That’s when I n

LuLu

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I’ve never been to one of these hookah places before. Pablo fits in fine in his polo shirt and leather jacket, but I’m wearing what I always wear to these business negotiations: a Metropolitan Zoo T-shirt, shorts, and flip-flops.

Jonesy's Rhino

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After Jonesy entered the bear habitat, he walked up to the biggest bear in the group and punched it square in the nose. The bear was visibly startled. I mean, bears don’t get punched that often. And there’s a reason: bears are ferocious animals.

Try Not to Die in Bayonne

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Dad says grandma is a cunt and it's probably true