The moon rose up on its tinfoil bed

Very nice. Loved the concluding lines.

Hi Darryl, glad I saw this a lovely poem

Enjoyed that very much, Darryl.

I feel so bouncy after reading this! Great adjectives!

A marvelous piece, DP. Great mix of form and phrasing. And what a marvelous title. The closing is very effective.

“I had to laugh. Your
scarf was covered in dust.”

Fav.

Wonderful sweet poem and great images.

Terrific lines in here! The last stanza pulls me right along! Magic, magic ending. He's got the chops!

Great, great work, Darryl. We're all clothes inside the washing machine - Wisdom is a choice you make not to be an asshole.
YES! *!

Darryl, this came across with a lot of thought, and more than a little pain.

Oh, Darryl, your best work ever!! and the other poems you have written are awesome so that is saying something.
The first poem deals with the vagaries of the moon, such imagery - the next two poems deal with living life to the full and to our best ability! Horace Greeley said character is the only thing that endures and you have that in spades, it is evident in your words. Well, well done, Darryl!
fav

Agree that these are strong as a group. Love the way you go with such a unique thought, the title of the first one,just marvelous that,and bring it to a close with that equally great image. I also think these three & the first especially have perfect form and breaks to keep the meter seemless.

I think the full force of the moon poem is weakened by the two that follow and I think they should be cut. I like the moon poem because it stays with its central conceit throughout and it draws a line of wonderful sense, literally and figuratively, as well as conjuring night magic magically. Could have been recited by Puck. I'd love to see a DP poem without the ubiquitous "you" and I'd love to see an angle of address that alters the poet's stance and attack.

Good poetry, enjoyed reading all three. Interesting discussion, enjoyed reading that, too.

So full of life and ecstasy
One of your best yet!
*

very wonderful, DP

The moon poem is full of mystery and mischief, and so very lovely. Someone said s/he could hear it recited by Puck, and that is such a perfect compliment. Peace...

LOVE the title ("the moon rose up on its tinfoil bed") and all that follows. Excellent poem, Darryl! It navigates a twisting path and never loses its step.

Thank you so much for your support--all of you.Poetry isn't just one moment, one wink, one nod, one squeeze. It's an expansion, a progression, a happening that foretells other happenings. It's a connection not a phonecall. It's a field of flowers even when represented by one single stem in a vase. It's a blanket of stars, not a coat. It's never one shoe even if it looks to be. It's certainly someone touching a body of water with their palm and outstretched fingers, but this isn't meant to be captured in a jar. It's meant to create ripples and for those ripples to run back and forth between the earth and the sky creating musics upon musics. It's a beacon but the light isn't meant for one lonely ship only. Lastly, if I may, it's a sign, a hand print on the universal wall, but it doesn't just mean me, it means you, too. dp

"animal mythologies turning like keys."

If you just wrote these five words and stopped then posted this, I'd be gushing about the power, the talent, saying how craft like this is why we keep trying.

Love these two poems together, DP, but the first one really knocked me out - the simplicity of it, the one long bright image, sometimes flickering and breaking up but always pulling itself back together. It is simple and strong and powerful. And the words on the page are beautiful, too.

I love the first piece. Great flavors that I remember from a long ago love, even years later.

Yes, yes.

Thanks, Tracy. Actually BIG ESCAPE is a love poem, too. One of my personal favorites because it speaks of having to love, not wanting to love, and sometimes being the only witness to it. That's painful, but that's life.Thanks so much for the read.

liked the first one and can't tell you why, which I suppose is consistent with the poems-should-not-mean-but-be school of thought.

Loved the imagery, the language, and the shift in perspective between the poet seeing the moon as a balloon, and the companion seeing it as a cork in the wake.

Really loved the closing stanza. "I had to laugh. Your scarf was covered in dust." Well done.

The comments you have received above say more together than I can alone. However, I will say that every line carried a magnificent and quiet image of a voyage that seems to be headed nowhere, and having arrived, simultaneously.

Beautiful imagery. I love the last stanza.

This seems almost a prose poem, but cut apart and pasted into the framework of verse... an interested dichotomy. I liked the line "there was no noticeable splash."

I love the line about being like hair pins. The analogy is whimsical yet mysterious.

Loved this when I read it as a submission, and I still do.

Loved the moon, and enjoyed the bonuses. Thanks.

Wow. This is gleaming. And has the most perfect title. I adore it. *

These are all enjoyable. I like the first poem best. It has a nice Oriental quality, a bit like Kenko if he were put into poetry.