Stories tagged ouch

Truth Smack

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Each hour I checked my six e-mail accounts. The universe refused to validate my unnecessary existence.

The Definitive Book of Love, Unabridged

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You know the basics. The book had to be written by Captain Kangaroo, what with his penis, vagina and dream planets conjunct in Leo with his cherry red chipper dapper coat to match.

Shell

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He stuck her in a shell and she became the shell, reeked of shell, his powerless accomplice with seeds in her hair.

Happy Birthday!

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[WARNING: DO NOT OPEN UNTIL 'R XMAS!]

There Was This Girl

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Oh! Oh! This girl this girl this very little girl was found and found and found again, tied to trees, tied to tracks, stuck in bubbly stew, shot with arrows, hacked to bits with ambitious ax.

Leon Valley of the Dolls

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There's a flag she waves high and it is not white.