176033
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“Hey there!/
Here I am, a fucking moustache!/
I’m the biggest damn moustache/
you’ll ever see
|
159934
|
Days went by as I stood in the woods waiting for a tree to fall, and when none did, I determined the universe is cold and indifferent and that man’s only hope is to buy wood chippers.
|
34500
|
"The stink makes the clothes more authentic," Derik said with a smile.
"I don't really care about authenticity. I just think it looks nice," Chelsea answered, sipping again at her shake. "I also like that belt."
|
4200
|
I said, I took off my underwear. Which even now, seems more like a non-sequitur rather than an admission of something – responsibility?
|
18200
|
“Everybody’s seen Tom Waits,” Chris said. “Everybody. His son’s a real asshole. I can’t remember his name, so let’s call him Fred. My friend saw Fred walking with his Dad, in Orinda or somewhere, and was like, fuck you Fred! And fuck yo
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8841
|
My friend Abbs and I were out the other night in Williamsburg since it was so deliciously warm. You'd think the warm weather would put everyone in a good mood, but there's always gotta be one asshole. I went to park my car in front of Harefield Road only to see some…
|
2800
|
When I couldn't take any more of her abuse, she reached over and ruffled my hair as if that condescending act was going to make amends for the tremendous injury she caused my ego. Then she kissed me. I stood still not knowing how to react. I felt her tong
|
93422
|
My iPhone screen illuminates, vibrating on the bar. It amuses me to no end to see my comrades seated upon the neighboring stools grasp anxiously at their phones, parallel companions to their beers. I can almost read the thoughts accompanying their…
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