1691 4 1
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I'm delighted to report that I've come up with my own school of thought. It's called, "Dress Like a Cat Until You Get What You Want."
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34011817
|
Sex when you’re pregnant
Is like sex when you aren’t
Pregnant, but with extra people.
|
19372013
|
"For God's sake," my mother said. "There could be anthrax in the candy."
My mother worried about me going out on Halloween.
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149433
|
salmon
maple syrup
horseradish
smoke detector
the list read, scrawled in purple marker on the refrigerator door.
|
23632121
|
Theresa stopped speaking to me because I ate cows. This made things simple. There was no conversation.
|
19861110
|
"I looked at this skinny, little female child, Meadow Simms. It wasn't only that she was small. Meadow Simms didn't look like other children. Her parents were hippies."
|
48133220
|
It’s never good to get arrested on an empty stomach.
|
44151912
|
It was a sore molar that was giving me trouble, on the bottom right. The dentist, about whose adulterous affairs everybody in the neighborhood knew and whispered about, ts-ts-ts'ed me and murmured "decay" before pulling out the drill.
|
34762214
|
I used to score girls by taking them on a ride past Frauenstein, up on a hill where you could see the trees, the whole lot of them sparkling white and pink in the breeze.
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