George

I remember this piece. Very matter-of-fact language - "...wants to see
the boss who had treated him well. 'Hey,
Bob! It's me, George!' Kind­ness is mag­netic..." -
quite effective, Bill. The form is just right. I like it.

".. slinks back .."

Tattoos.

Nicely put. A summation waiting for a jury ... or a crime.

So much pain and truth in this short tale. "the past is a loose adhesive and rarely is employment a glue." Nice.

I think I remember this, too.

"“Hey,Bob! It's me, George!”"

Boy, that line speaks volumes.

What an interesting moment to capture, be aware of as revealing of a vet's inner drive-- for the known (including when *he* was known as a *he* he could know.)

"...a hel­met on his soul."

I find these five words to be perfect craft. The entire poem is a fine piece, but these five words, the image, how much weight it carries in this, nothing short of a monument, the true north any writer is normally searching for when starting out.

Your poem is alive with insight and meaning, form and craft, each word and phrase. I remember George, I used to work with him.

I agree with all, especially Sheldon: "a helmet on his soul." Yes! *

Chilling and powerful, and yet so understated. Wow.

brings me right back to the late 1970s when i used to see the movies (i was not even a teenager then) hear about vietnam from my elders, began to understand what had happened. this is amazing, i love it.

Sorrowful even shameful but poignant in showing the mistreatment of traumatized souls--sent to hell, and the few who stagger back no longer recognize the world even in a friend's eyes because they are changed forever by what they've witnessed and what they've participated in--life or death in an instant.Helmet on his soul says it all. Sometimes death is just something that still seems alive but for all intents and purposes isn't by half.You've created a nice reckoning to the situation.

Really wonderful, Bill *!

Outstanding imagery: "the past is a loose adhesive," "slinks back to the deserted battlefield...." Very strong. *

Jack is right - this imagery is amazing. the first few lines I can picture so perfectly. Big fave.

great poem.

Missed this somehow, but wow, what power. The helmut on his soul is the soul of this poem, the soul of George. Peace *

Wonderful Bill, from a guy from back then who was neither Bob nor George, and ached & still do for us all over that travesty. You need that detachment sometimes to imagine you went through it, and the voice here is perfect, its very matter-of-factness Sam mentions then just reveals how dismal the mess was & is even more.

"rarely is employment a glue"

And the last lines that crown or cap the portrait. Fine work.

*

unusual characterizations but the writing is alive!

Effective piece, Bill.

Amazingly full story in just 14 lines, Bill. Do you intend this as an unrhymed sonnet? I certainly think it works as such--tho the piece stands powerfully for whatever the 14 line length & last two line reversal might intend, or not.

Bill, this is fantastic. The imagery is great, yet simple. Fav.

I enjoyed this poem very much Bill. I wasn't in Nam but what a perfect example to learn from for todays world.

Fave.