by Darryl Price
looking space packed right in up there
like a sun bleached kite stuck in between
the several bluish colors
of the sky today has its own
amazing heartbeat. I can see
it clearly from here. Oh I can feel it
reverberating for miles and
miles. If I look away it waits
on my returning gaze like a
silent yet good-natured friend. I dedicate
its honeyed song to you today. No one
else will ever write this down nor
remember the one short time in
summer's fire that it showed itself
like an omen to only me. It's
about all I have now that's not
already gone to the birds of
sad time and schoolboy circumstance
like so many crumbs of a once
delicious favorite slice
of remembered bread. It's fed me
like a cake one more time to be
believing in something I can't
actually see coming and
moved on and I've given the rest
of its quietly fluttering
breath to the poem dripping in your hands .
070510
13
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"Please don't confront me with my failures, I have not forgotten them."--Jackson Browne
The poem is about the inevitable loss we all experience from time to time, the moment that comes and goes, sometimes even before you get the chance to be thankful for it, or share it with someone you love. That's why in the end I say I give the last breath of it over to the poem--that's the only place left where it can be fully shared with you, the reader.
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This is a form that fits with your voice as a writer, DP - As in these lines in the closing stanza:
"It's fed me
like a dream one more time to be
believing in something I can't
actually see coming..." - a wonderful description, among other things, of the writing process. Good piece.
Loved it, Darryl. Heartbeat and fluttering breath brought it alive for me. Fav.
Darryl, I really enjoyed this piece, especially the first stanza! It seemed to me to be an homage to imagination.
The last two stanzas work beautifully: "It's
about all I have now that's not
already gone to the birds of
sad time and schoolboy circumstance
like so many crumbs of a once
delicious favorite slice
of remembered bread."
Loved this~
Sam,Myra and Teri: thank you. You just made my day worthwhile.
Great form to this poem, it works so well. My favorite image is “poem in your hands.” I just love that. And I always enjoy your titles and the way they work.
Kari Nguyen--you are a kind sweet soul. Thank you so much. dp
It has its own amazing heartbeat. Fed me like a dream. One more time.
Wonderful imagery: sunbleached kite, honeyed song, schoolboy circumstance. I also love the poem's intricate structure.
Lovely!
JMC and Marcelle--Thanks!
great catch of that moment in time where you realize you are in a special time, that glorious second or so where that time becomes poetry. and it feels as you read you are of that moment, not experiencing it in retrospect.
That means it's working, Walt, and perhaps we might all get home again after all. Thanks for the read.
This captures the sheer joy:
I can see/it from here. Oh I can feel it/reverberating for miles and/miles.
You are not behind the camera is this poem -- you are the camera. Fav. Peace...
This is packed, Darryl. Beautiful language, just the right line breaks, and a piece that about the narrator and then finally to the reader. These moments were the most nourishing for me:
"...a sunbleached kite stuck between/the several bluish colors/of the sky today has its own/amazing heartbeat."
AND
"...I dedicate/its honeyed song to you.No one/else will ever write this down nor/remember the one short time in/summer's fire that it showed itself/like a sign unto just me."
Of course, the narrator turning to me, the reader, at the very end and releasing that "fluttering breath" is just an amazing moment in this.
Splendid.
Everyone above has said it all beautifully. This poem resonates and rolls right into memory and love. Loved so many lines, and the ending is just perfect.*
Very beautiful.
"No one
else will ever write this down nor
remember the one short time in
summer's fire that it showed itself
like a sign unto just me."
Sigh. This is just lovely. I especially love the image of the sunbleached kite stuck between several bluish colors of sky. So nice.
Oh I can feel it
reverberating for miles and
miles.If I look away it waits
for my returning gaze like a
silent good friend.
-----------------------------
Very nice work. I can also see it in tiny pieces, segmented. For some reason this is the the moment I warm to the most. Lovely.
darryl, what u and i have in common, is a fine appreciation for the small fleeting moments. blink and its gone, but not before you saw it, took it in, and grasped its meaning. wonderful poem!
Thank you so much--all of you. I know you'd probably rather read my work when it's pure and from the deepest well of the soul--like the Sunflower poem so many of you enjoyed--but sometimes I just want to be in the moment of mystery between the human experience and the mystery and wonder of being here now and bearing witness to something I might not even understand. I try my best to do this with you in mind--I don't want to ever forget that we are in this life together.
Ah, Darryl, well it's been said already, but I ain't shy, and I'll say it again (and happily click that tenth *) - this is gorgeous, the tiny moment with all its grand meaning. The small thing which is exquisitely large, the memory which glitters still... This is a gift, a treasure!
Beautiful poem, DP, it has your poet signature all over it, softly sensuous work
Very beautiful poetry. These are my favorite ones from you.
That Particular Diamond is my favorite of these, but all wonderful works!
such great imagery here: sunbleached kite, remembered bread, poem in hands.
and in the next, they boil roses... great rep of harm done -- my favorite:
...turns
the ocean's middle
into a snowman's
plastic belly.