by Meg Pokrass
You would hate it if you knew how many times I apply lipstick now that you're gone. I'm putting it on, like, every five minutes to get through the next fifteen, though I know they use fish scales to make it, and it's like killing fish to put on lipstick for no reason. Nobody usually sees my champagne-grape stained lips except myself, and two adorable medical professionals.
If I had been a cat you probably would have kept me forever, even with an incurable disease. I think about that every time I clean the litter pan, especially late at night. I clean it too often because it makes the cats love each other more, and also because I can smell how sad I really am in the unpleasant odor of their piss, which I've read glows under black light.
In bed, my eyelids behave like cheap polyester drapes, unable to keep out the light. I wake from dreams about us walking nowhere... covered with butterflies. I can taste you with my feet the way butterflies taste leaves and flowers. Without you here, I notice too much about how the town is changing, new money moving in, teenage girls with their rubbery, flat stomachs. They walk around cold-eyed, like billboards about nothing.
Sometimes, I drive to the Taste It where they use organic bags. As I shop, I try not to gawk at girl's stomachs like I used to try not to stare at perfect front lawns. If I had a flat stomach, and a perfect lawn, and if I were not dying - you might have stayed here on my sofa, drinking beer and burping to mark your territory.
I'm a sloth, it's what we had in common. And the fact that our left eyes feel much more connected to the intuitive parts of our brains than our right eyes do.
The first time we made love, I remember how we talked about the fact that bulls are really color blind, and how a red garment has nothing to do with their rightful anger. How just having to cope with a cape being waved at you by some short murderer dressed up like a kid on Halloween would be bad enough.
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This story appeared in Keyhole.
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Meg, what can I say? This is poignant, of course, and rendered with such fantastic ease and brilliance. At no point does it cease to sparkle, right up to the end. Amazing.
Wonderful use of words that flows the story like poetry. Your imagery packs the punch of the drama. I love the opening, the lipstick--it's such a normal thing to do amid an abnormal situation. Great stuff.
A marvelous piece - with a beautiful sadness in it. Every bit of specific imagery here works well - lipstick, cat litter, eyelids, flat stomachs & perfect lawns, color blind bulls, the doctor - leading to the explanation of the tattoo. The form is just right. I really like the fact that it's all interior - no dialogue in place. A wonderful story, definitive - exceptional writing.
stomachs like perfect grass, burping to mark territory- this is a wonderful playground. Great story about fading.
this is my favorite of your many wondrous stories. i will refrain from going on and on about how inspiring and thrilling this story is on so many levels to me as a writer and how brutalizing and heartcrushing for every other part of me.
thank you very much Ajay! So appreciated.
Thank you Susan - I'm so glad the poetry is there - i love to know that it is, a was a poet before a flasher!
Sam, thank you so much.
David - aw! and more. and yes, well, thanks!!
Meg, I'm blown blown by this one. As down as I was and have been about writing...with stories like this out there, I will keep trying to keep on. This one really inspires on so many levels.
And congratulations on your elimae-inspired chapbook. I can't wait to own it.
One of my favorite lines is, "They walk around cold-eyed, like billboards about nothing." I love the train of thought you allow this character to run with; it really develops her personality. Excellent work.
This is killer. Just killer.
Thanks so much, David, Cynthia, and Sheldon. I'm so glad. It came from from one of my strange prompt exercises using animal facts.
cynthia said the line that really jumped out at me too during every read - such a great billboard line
Meg you are so wonderful to read. I absolutely love this!
Lisa, thank you!! Happy Thanksgiving!
Gobble gobble!!
Beautifully done, Meg. Every observation is a door into a thousand more: "They walk around cold-eyed, like billboards about nothing." Loved this one.
thank you, Ru!
Here is a spectacular line as I've ever read: "In bed, my eyelids behave like cheap polyester drapes, unable to keep out the light." Then I read this one: " They walk around cold-eyed, like billboards about nothing."
This is one my favorite stories from you...well, from anyone.
I'm thrilled that you enjoyed it, Gay!!!! Thank you so much for saying so. This means a lot.
Amazing prose, Meg. I enjoyed this so, so much. Read it three times through...incredibly sad and powerful.
I love this character...she is so in touch with her world yet somehow out of touch with the world at large. I would love to see another story depicting her life.
Thank you so much, Brett, and TJ!
vid this, yes?
This story is really how heartbreak works: you focus on anything else to take your mind off the pain. Here you've done that so beautifully with the girls' flat stomachs, the butterflies (love the line where you taste your lover through the butterfly's feet!) and then when you just have to zero on those painful moments of togetherness you do it with that tender/sweet comment about the bull fight. Love this.
Holy cow, I love this. I felt like you were writing a piece of my life story. That bit about the doctor recommending Yoga--brilliant detail. And noticing young women. It's the way you say it, I think, more than anything that makes the story unique.
Beautifully rendered. Tender and fierce. Excellent work. It does the job from word one.
Thank you Tina, and Jamey, and D.P. I'm so glad.
magnificent, meg! i especially like the detail about bulls. how our motivations are not always so obvious and how we shouldn't believe things just because we are told. i really like this narrator -- she is complex and contradictory. in other words, she is real. very nice work, as usual!
Thanks, Lauren!! Yeah, I really hate bull fights, and it felt good to write about that, it did indeed!
Great piece Meg. I loved the line, "If I had been a cat you probably would have kept me forever, even with an incurable disease."
Your stories make me sadly happy.
Thank you Jim, and Grego - what you say here makes me sadly happy!
One of the saddest stories I've ever read, it felt like I had looked into the closet of someone I don't know and saw their stash of dirty clothes, tampax, their whole history of pain. Amazing story, wonderful details. Great ending.
I really enjoyed this the first time I read it, but it's been ringing in my ears ever since. Excellent work.
Thank you Susan and Tara! This feels like the tiny story that keeps on giving. Your comments are greatly appreciated.
I haven't seen this before, but I think it's one of your absolute best.
This story is perfect example of what flash fiction should do: give you so much more than is actually there. Really brilliant.
The third paragraph should be framed. It dreams and dreams on.