by Jack Swenson
One morning I go outside, and there are a cat and seven kittens in the field across the street. My wife and I organize a roundup. We trap the mama cat, then we capture the kittens. It takes us all day.
We put the kittens in a dog crate. We give them food and water and some toys to play with. They pounce on a tiny mouse and tear it to bits. There's nothing inside but plastic. The kittens are not happy. They squeal and squirm when we pick them up.
We find homes for five of the kittens and keep two. One of the ones that we keep is the runt. He is a tiny gray tabby with big ears. We name him Gorgeous George.
We bring in the mother cat, too, and she tries to kill her son. A week on valium solves that problem. No, we don't take the valium; we give it to the cat.
George grows up to be a bruiser. The other one is a delicate long-haired calico. We call her Monica. She has none of her namesake's traits, however. She hates boys. Indeed, she hates most everything. She is an ornery cat.
My wife and I are cat people. Indeed, that's how we met. We met at a wake. The widow was once a sort of girlfriend of mine. I'd get together with her now and then, if you catch my drift. She and my wife went to nursing school together. At the wake, I ducked outside for a smoke and found a stranger petting the widow's cat. It was love at first sight.
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Another wholesome, upbeat story, which is of course my trademark.
From the heart, this sings. The funniest line i've read in a long time, "No, we don't take the Valium; we give it to the cat."
Solid, Jack. Good pacing - but I really like the punch of the closing paragraph: "My wife and I are cat people. Indeed, that's how we met. We met at a wake. The widow was once a sort of girlfriend of mine. I'd get together with her now and then, if you catch my drift. She and my wife went to nursing school together. At the wake, I ducked outside for a smoke and found a stranger petting the widow's cat. It was love at first sight." Not a missed word in it. Straight ahead - matter of fact: "that's how we met ... if you catch my drift ... I ducked outside for a smoke". Warm - inviting phrasings and style. Good one.
Oh yes, the line about giving Valium to the cat is terrific.
Liked this a lot. Perhaps "We keep the runt."
Oh, I loved your Author's Note!
I liked this story a lot, Jack. Pulled me in. As I write this, my cat Kiki is hiding in the basement after I tried to get her into a carry-all to take her to the vet. Ah, cats! Anyway...I really like this. Well done. Maybe I can get some Valium for Kiki. Can you spare some?
This has such movement to it yet it seems to swirl in on itself. Love it.
Jack, I love your humor. It is so natural and unforced, as is your prose. You write with a confident voice. Great work. .
As a lover of the feline variety, I am quite partial to your lovely story.
OMG, Jack, you really do round up (herd) cats! Loved this! fav
There you go, Jack Swenson, thinking you can sneak a Jack Swenson story by me! But I found you, as I always do! Ha ha!
Okay, somehow this one was out there for two days before I read it. But I've read it now. And it's great, particularly that last paragraph, which I found superb. Fave!
Aren't there two separate stories here?
1. Monica and Gorgeous George--the ornery cat who hates boys and the bruiser.
2. the narrator and his wife.
Like Fictionaut others, I'm a fan of that last paragraph, but doesn't it belong in another flash and isn't there an ending missing here?
I admire the writing of both parts!