Wish I Had
A pet scorpion.
A pet scorpion named Chris.(1)
A deceased scorpion named Chris encased in Lucite.™(2)
A belt buckle made from a deceased scorpion once named Chris encased in Lucite.™
An ornate leather belt to wear with the Chris in Lucite™ belt buckle featuring my deceased pet scorpion named Chris.
A little stone turtle figurine, purchased from El Mercado(3) in San Antonio during the same visit when I buy the ornate leather belt.
A fancy leather whip(4) from El Mercado in San Antonio that I can wear hanging from the side of the ornate leather belt with the scorpion belt buckle.
An embroidered Mexican dress that would look good with my belt, whip, and Chris (the scorpion).(5)
(1) In second grade, Chris was the first boy I ever liked. He was unbelievably cute but he never paid any attention to me, preferring to throw rocks with the other boys.
(2) When Chris (the scorpion) dies of natural causes, I won't just throw his body away.
(3) There's an amazing Mexican market in downtown San Antonio. You can buy leather goods, clothes, and onyx chess sets. I once bought a little stone turtle figurine and snuck it into Chris' (the boy, not the deceased scorpion) desk. He never knew it was me.
(4) Chris (the boy) had one of these whips. This made me want one too, so I saved up and bought one. I hit myself in the face with it pretty badly once. If I had one now, I'd be a lot more careful.
(5) I think Chris (the boy) would like me in the dress. We could talk about growing up in San Antonio, and I could show him Chris (the deceased pet scorpion) in the Lucite™ belt buckle. I might not tell him that the scorpion's name was Chris.(6)
(6) If a pet scorpion named Chris (the scorpion) dies, and you wear it in a Lucite™ belt buckle, is it correct to say that the dead scorpion is still named Chris (the scorpion)? Is it okay to regret never seeing the boy named Chris (the boy) again?
A pet scorpion named Chris.(1)
A deceased scorpion named Chris encased in Lucite.™(2)
A belt buckle made from a deceased scorpion once named Chris encased in Lucite.™
An ornate leather belt to wear with the Chris in Lucite™ belt buckle featuring my deceased pet scorpion named Chris.
A little stone turtle figurine, purchased from El Mercado(3) in San Antonio during the same visit when I buy the ornate leather belt.
A fancy leather whip(4) from El Mercado in San Antonio that I can wear hanging from the side of the ornate leather belt with the scorpion belt buckle.
An embroidered Mexican dress that would look good with my belt, whip, and Chris (the scorpion).(5)
(1) In second grade, Chris was the first boy I ever liked. He was unbelievably cute but he never paid any attention to me, preferring to throw rocks with the other boys.
(2) When Chris (the scorpion) dies of natural causes, I won't just throw his body away.
(3) There's an amazing Mexican market in downtown San Antonio. You can buy leather goods, clothes, and onyx chess sets. I once bought a little stone turtle figurine and snuck it into Chris' (the boy, not the deceased scorpion) desk. He never knew it was me.
(4) Chris (the boy) had one of these whips. This made me want one too, so I saved up and bought one. I hit myself in the face with it pretty badly once. If I had one now, I'd be a lot more careful.
(5) I think Chris (the boy) would like me in the dress. We could talk about growing up in San Antonio, and I could show him Chris (the deceased pet scorpion) in the Lucite™ belt buckle. I might not tell him that the scorpion's name was Chris.(6)
(6) If a pet scorpion named Chris (the scorpion) dies, and you wear it in a Lucite™ belt buckle, is it correct to say that the dead scorpion is still named Chris (the scorpion)? Is it okay to regret never seeing the boy named Chris (the boy) again?
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Author's Note
Accidentally hitting yourself in the face with a whip is not recommended. If you must, try to miss your eye.
(Couldn't get superscripts to work, but you get the idea)
To be published in Blood Sweat & Ink.
Other stories by Lynn Beighley
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Love.
I've been chastised for excessive annotations in online stories. "Too hard to scroll back and forth," The Editor said. "For you, maybe," I thought.
So, you go, girl. I think this is a great use of the device, as is the evolution / revelation of the story. Which is sweet, and was fun to read.
Well done.
I love this also. A slow and brilliant revelation about something we all share at one time or another in our lives, but have never expressed so well.
I'm thinking of a girl I knew in sixth grade at Holy Trinity elementary school. She never threw rocks at me, but then, she totally ignored me, which might have been worse. I dunno. We all lived on the beach. There weren't any rocks to be throwing.
Fave.
Oh, I see now that they weren't throwing rocks at you. Chris just ignored you, so the pain is/was the same.
I like the use of this form to tell this story. For me, it works both as an annotated story and as two separate entities.
now that i read them together, both parts seem to be part of one whole. i wanted to laugh out loud but somehow i couldn't and i rather liked that. i like that you end with a question. the scorpion, the buckle, could be part of a smokescreen but i prefer to read them as part of a gadgeteer's honest declaration.
Love the annotations! They feel like a puzzle, and add a cool layer of connection. *
Boudreau(1), James(2), Christian(3), Marcus(3), and Kim(3), thank you all so very much. You've made my difficult day much, much better.(4)
(1)Editors, schemditors. Look, a mitsake!
(2)If he'd thrown a rock at me, at least I'd have known he noticed me. Might have cooled my ardor.
(3)I hoped it would come across that way. Hoped the reader would have to read it twice.
(4)Thanks again!
100% exactly what I wanted to read today! How did you know? *
(fav)
really great *
this is hysterically wonderful! fave.
Annotated texts are the best and this is fine. Nice work?
Ever read Sinyavsky/Tertz's The Makepeace Experiment?
*
I meant "Nice work!" (That question mark was a typo! My apologies!)
Love, love the structure of this piece - the footnotes are brilliant. So funny *!
This is remarkable. *
Oh, this is fun! Like it mucho! -- * Q
Well done! *
Loved this! Brilliant writing!!!!
******
Funny, funny! Great choices, and well-orchestrated progression.