70,000 BC: What I Want
I don't ask for much. No, don't grunt at me, it's true. Give me a smooth boulder and a stone I can hold in my hand for grinding, maybe a sharp bit of flint for scraping. A new stick I can dig with, my old one's really worn. Shrgk's mate just got her a new stick and he even smoothed it for her so she wouldn't get splinters. Thoughtful, that Grlg is. Shrgk doesn't know how good she has it. All she does is sit on that stack of hides and pop out babies. Every time I look at her, she's all like, "Blrkg, look, a new baby. I just thought I was getting fat." Then she laughs. How I hate her laugh. Everybody oohs and ahhs over her babies. And there I am, bent over, grubbing around with this old stick, looking for roots. Her stick, I don't think she's even used it yet. I know what she can do with that stick of hers. Except that would be a waste of a good stick.
I could use some new hides. Yes, I know these are new, but they're too small. I'd have to stitch them together to do anything with them, and you know how much I hate sewing. Look, grab that piece of coal, I'll show you how you can hunt down a big animal.
Whaddya mean, I'm backseat hunting again?
I could use some new hides. Yes, I know these are new, but they're too small. I'd have to stitch them together to do anything with them, and you know how much I hate sewing. Look, grab that piece of coal, I'll show you how you can hunt down a big animal.
Whaddya mean, I'm backseat hunting again?
|
15
favs |
570 views
18 comments |
248 words
All rights reserved. |
Author's Note
The author has not attached a note to this story.
Other stories by Lynn Beighley
Tags
This story has no tags.
Comments
You must
log in
to post comments.
I like the hard edge and fun in this piece -
"I could use some new hides. Yes, I know these are new, but they're too small. I'd have to stitch them together to do anything with them, and you know how much I hate sewing. Look, grab that piece of coal, I'll show you how you can hunt down a big animal." Yes.
And especially like the closing sentence. Good voice throughout.
Yes.
"Except that would be a waste of a good stick."
*
Quite funny! Love this approach to the "What I Wanted" group.
Thanks Sam, Boudreau, Christian. Stick envy's insidious.
Shrgk seems like quite a catch, his outlook on life is very commendable! His name alone is brilliant! very funny...
Interesting. You are approaching why we even tell stories. Caves in France. Barbaric Yawps over fire. We, our culture, will discard most any thing. But we have not discarded stories.
glow
This is a hoot! Great stuff, Lynn.
Lots of fun! I'd cut the last line.
Got some comments that time, di'n't'cha?
Clearly I need to channel my inner cavegirl more often. Thanks everyone!
"Quest For Fire" meets your sass. Excellent, LB.
*
Incredibly original take on the theme, and the voice is perfect! I'm still laughing...*
I love that last line and so damn funny!!! Totally enjoyed this! Thanks, Lynn!
Love that last line. A zinger from the dawn of humanity.
Oh hell yes. :D
Lynn, I enjoyed reading this and thinking of it later as well. I enjoy your cleverness. *
I love this one. I'd split up the "How I hate her laugh" part to make it conversational, and give it better comic timing:
Then she laughs.
How I hate her laugh.
Everybody oohs...
Otherwise I loved it and laughed a lot more than I did during the caveman movie Year One...
:D This is delightful. Fave.