Cake
by John Riley
The girl's hand is pressed against the tree. It's early summer
and her skin is still white with winter. Her boyfriend stands beside her.
Both are laughing, their teeth two rows of washed shells
in the watermelon-stained sunset. There is the scent
of lighter fluid and meat and now at last I reach the memory
of cake between his lips, and how he wanted it, and wants it still,
standing beside the fire-escape, where birds lift
into the alley air.
and her skin is still white with winter. Her boyfriend stands beside her.
Both are laughing, their teeth two rows of washed shells
in the watermelon-stained sunset. There is the scent
of lighter fluid and meat and now at last I reach the memory
of cake between his lips, and how he wanted it, and wants it still,
standing beside the fire-escape, where birds lift
into the alley air.
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Author's Note
Originally published at Connotation Press. Thanks, Mia.
Other stories by John Riley
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Reads a little like a photograph.*
yes! *
Wow. Gorgeous micro, John. Very vivid and evocative.
a memory you can taste. *
A synesthetic love and longing feast. One of my all-time favorites.. ***
Thanks nice people for your comments. I did want to capture taking off from an image, Amanda. You guys are great.
Makes me want to grab my hands out to catch him - that image, that memory, that moment.*
Synesthesia, a new word (for me) Thanks, Mia! I could use a little cake, now, too. *
Thanks Emily and Mathew. Mia is pretty good with words, isn't she.
What Kathy said, so vivid. Nice work, John.
*
Both captures and uses the sense memories that mean so much to us as human beings.
Powerful image in the closing - birds lifting into the air. *
The wistful quality is very appealing. *
I love how visual this is, and you even throw in the scents. And I love "white with winter" *
What everyone said. ***
Thanks everyone. You've made my morning.
And God said, "Let there be cake."
*****
I love what Amanda says. Very visual and textured. Love this.*
Thanks so much James and Jen. I'm so happy you like it.
wow! transported there *
Beautifully put-together.
Thanks Jane and Darryl. Happy it works for you both.
There is a central thought for me as a reader—she has a boyfriend despite her winter skin in summer (I thought of my own lack of sun tan until July and then not an even one, and why would someone bother? For other reasons) and the taste of cake brought a memory for me of asking for wedding cake while sitting in my dad's former office at home and of my boyfriend darting to the store and buying a white cake on the spot and returning with it and plastic forks. Sorry to explain my associations too much, yet the effect of this piece is to be itself while conjuring associations in its suggestiveness. *
If it conjured memories, Ann, I take that as a success. Thanks so much for reading and revealing.