by Darryl Price
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A short essay on the skills needed to be an x-ray tech;you're not buying that,why not?What I'm trying to do here is something new in bridge work and at the same time something real for loved ones lost to history. For instance this is a real honest to god reaction to a real person that suddenly popped into my head but seen through centuries of imposed mythologizing. But I'm saying I don't care about all that. The connection can still be made and felt if we believe in it enough to create it as such. I'm trying my best with my limited poet's powers to thank this being in my own clumsy way and to honor her presence from that moment til now. Just because I want to, and I feel like it.There is no axe to grind. Nothing is being asked for in return. It is simply the poem that became the thought that started with the feeling. We've all got a long slow dance ahead of us.
Original version slated to be published in the HOPELESS ROMANTIC Feb.14,2012 issue thanks to Judith A Lawrence.
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"like a bear's jaws crunching our silky
skulls into stardust and fevered dreams forever"
Exactly!
Great title too!
Nicely done, DP. Especially like the form.
Wonderful lines - the closing stanza:
"to want to destroy the known universe
with a mighty thrust of its horns.
It's not your fault alone. We cannot
shake the smell of your sweet beautiful closeness
without being torn apart by a biting
sadness like a bear's jaws crunching our silky
skulls into stardust and fevered dreaming forever."
Good writing.
ok, i think we're all a bit taken with this image:
a biting
sadness like a bear's jaws crunching our silky
skulls into stardust
oh yes, dp
More greatness from you, Darryl!
Great poem, very effective in illustrating the story and message.
This simple image below is my absolute favorite:
“You could summon the Mother's absolute love
from a buried stone simply by holding
out your palms.”
I think this is going on my list of favorite quotes. *
I love the poem. The poetry of its flow. Its words, imagery, and message.
The Author's Note is an interesting bit of writing on its own. The poem doesn't need it, or the quote, for me.
This works, man. That first line is killer.
"You generated coal light from your gait"
Love the coal light, love the bear jaws, and also love the line: "You/wore always a warm candle in your face."
Nice images. Works for me. *
i can see you're doing something new and it didn't open itself to a first superfluous reading which i really liked-i had to dig in again, shut my ears, shut kids and music out and focus (another good thing that came from this). now, the poem gave me lots of joy, thank you darryl. your notes are always great value, too: "We've all got a long dance ahead of us." yes.
I enjoyed the notes and comments here as much as the piece itself. *
I love that whole first image -- the idea of the sun crawlign through the sleepy forest:
"You generated coal light from your gait
as easily as the new sun crawls
through a sleepy forest, without worry over
hot spillage..."
Wonderful stuff, DP. As always. You dare to write it like you feel it, and I am always glad to come here and find you.
*
Great first line. Powerful poem.
One of my own personal favorites. I've played around with this one for years--simply because I knew it was one of my more important pieces and I wanted to get it right. Current version is the right one for me. Thanks all!