Passion
by Jill Chan
Strike out all commands
and commandments.
Love begins
freely by itself.
Passion
commands you
to lift your eyes.
To stand.
And follow
where he goes.
From there to there.
From words
to meaning―
how complicated
it is.
How complex
love makes it.
A single word―
complex as need.
And silence?
How difficult to not say.
How easy to just look.
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Author's Note
from the poem sequence Passion
Other stories by Jill Chan
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Yes
'Passion
commands you
to lift your eyes.
To stand.'
Lovely *
I'd take a new look at the line "it is." You'll want all the lines to hold the same kind of pressure. You could probably cut it and go from:
How complicated
How complex
Love makes it
"How difficult to not say.
How easy to just look."
***
"Love begins/freely by itself."
A nice thought.
Thank you Mathew, Arturo, Rachna, and Erika. Your comments are much appreciated.
Arturo, thanks for the close read and suggestion. That "it is" bothered me too.
I like, especially the bare, terse lines.
Form and theme work well together. Good work. *
Thank you, Kitty, and John. Much appreciated.