Long Walks On the Beach: Song

I don't like long walks on the beach 

Or sand between my toes 

Jellyfish stinging my butt  

Saltwater up my nose 

 

I don't like long lingering glances

But I sure like fancy pantses

And yes, a bum without a bottle

Is like a car without a throttle

 

You are the author

Of your own body

But you are the riddle

Of my soul

 

You are the author

Of your body

But the riddle

Of my soul

 

I thought I'd take a long walk

Down Memory Lane for luck

But I got run down in the crosswalk

By a hopped-up pick-up truck

 

When the driver of that truck

Got out to help me to my feet

I could tell by the lines on his face

That he could be kinda sweet

 

And right after I got home from the doctor's

He took me out to eat

He swept up my apartment

Then swept me off my feet

 

You are the author

Of your own body

But you are the riddle

Of my soul

 

Yes, you are the author

Of my body

And the riddle

Of my soul