Are you there? It's been so long since I had someone to talk to. Besides Oscar and Wilde, I mean. I feed them crumbs of bread. They're my pet rats, my only friends. Besides you, of course. How kind of you to remember me! How shall I begin?
I haven't always been here, you know. Not in this dark place, like being locked in a closet. Once I was like you. I lived in a world of sunshine, flowers, fresh baguettes, morning coffee, unlocked doors, places to go to, people who saw me, smiles, and I smiled, too.
Then the black bulldog grabbed me. That's how my misery began. It got me in its grip, pulling me down to where I couldn't find myself, and the more I struggled to get free, the more it locked onto me tighter, until I couldn't breathe. Now I don't fight it anymore. It's easier that way.
I don't remember how long I've been here. I'm just so glad you visited! I apologize for the mess. Please, eat these crumbs of bread! Somewhere in the darkness is a key. I misplaced it, has that ever happened to you? If you find it on your way out, give it to Oscar and Wilde. They'll know what to do.
Closet doors frighten me. That's why I'm in the far corner of this forgotten place. But it'd be nice to know the key is with my two dear friends, before I forget.
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For the 52|250-word theme “unseen.”
Oubliette is from the French word “oublier,” meaning, “to forget.” This word eventually came to describe an oubliette, a type of dungeon for the forgotten.
Illustration: Torre della Muda, where Ugolino della Gherardesca, featured in Dante's Divine Comedy, was imprisoned and left to starve to death in 1289.
This is packed with metaphors, Frank. Some obvious, some not. I like the subtle way you get around to saying that the jailer and prisoner are one and the same through the misplaced key.
Well done.
Great atomosphere, Frank. The becomes a powerful trope.
"I haven't always been here, you know. Not in this dark place, like being locked in a closet. Once I was like you. I lived in a world of sunshine, flowers, fresh baguettes, morning coffee, unlocked doors, places to go to, people who saw me, smiles, and I smiled, too."
This piece works well - Good ending. Nice approach to the 52|250 theme.
Like "Notes from the Oubliette" idea. Expected this to be darker, but there's a cheerfulness and an unexpected optimism in this narrator. Why is he still happy?
Look at Samuel Johnson's Diaries, Prayers, and Meditations (volume of Yale series) to see an 18th C version of "Notes from the Oubliette." Johnson was chased by the Black Dog (his phrase for depression) too.
"...and the more I struggled to get free, it locked onto me tighter, until..."
should be
"and the more I struggled to get free, the more it locked onto me tighter, until..."
My favorite oubliette in literature is the dungeon of Edmond Dantes in the Chateau D'If.
James and Sam, many thanks for your generous comments, and the faves! So glad you liked it.
Bill, your feedback is greatly appreciated. Thanks for taking the time to read my latest piece. I'm always learning from you.
"Then the black bulldog grabbed me. That's how my misery began. It got me in its grip, pulling me down to where I couldn't find myself, and the more I struggled to get free, the more it locked onto me tighter, until I couldn't breathe. Now I don't fight it anymore. It's easier that way."
The connection between fear and madness... Good story. I like it.
excellent, frank. totally works for me, especially that extra grain of madness (if that's what it is, it could be something entirely out of this, out of my and your world, privy to les citoyens d'oubliette, what use are these labels anyway esp. when attached to the mind) - and the rats oscar and wilde - brilliantly wild piece. POV works exquisitely.
I really like the title...has a cool kind of vibe. What a great grim/happy flash. The names of the rats are great.
I love the pace of this, Frank, and the title. And I'm awed by how on the ball you are with your flash-schedule!
I love the form here, the way it is crafted as a letter, it works PERFECTLY for the subject matter, and though it is sad, there is that touch of humor that makes it whimsical. Fave.
Kim, Marcus, Jules, Michelle, Meg, many thanks from Oscar, and Wilde, and the author of Before I Forget (Notes from the Oubliette). Your visits and lovely comments greatly appreciated!
A really good twist on the black dog, love the oubliette metaphor. Like Bill says, the note of cheerfulness is surprising. I do like that, it adds a note of cheery madness to an otherwise dark subject.
Hi Frank--What great atmosphere here. The voice which is a bit childlike and welcoming captured me from the beginning. This piece is tragic, whimsical, sweet.
If I had heard of an oubliette before, I had forgotten -- not trying to be funny. :-) Really loved the narrator's voice in this piece - sharp, consistent, sounding sane in the craziness...... enjoyed it so much. Thank you.
I hope Oscar and Wilde kept the key for him, and that he remembered it eventually. Also like that the "you" here is another small friend. :)