MOSAIC
Your eyes coal-rimmed, busted,
burned by betrayal.
You and I, knee to knuckle,
skinny with disorders and
blurred around our edges.
Challenged by our experience
and the ash of past-love
dusting the grate, the state, the grace
of our rose-chipped future
in place
like mosaic.
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Written about my friend, Jay, and I who shared a delirious anorexic friendship back in the day. This is about a night in a mad-house when we both were on the edge of suicide but fought back together.
Goodness. This is strong work. The phrasings move toward perfect. *
That last stanza. Have you edited this since putting it up? It reads better.
No, I haven't :) How interesting, but thank you.
Well done.
Strong opening, heartfelt words throughout. Thanks for sharing the back story. *
Oh, yeah. The backstory helped me a lot, my being poetically dense and all. In fact I'm still aghast at the backstory. *
My past history reads like a play by Aeschylus, I'm afraid :/ But much better now x
This resonates with my own battle with the same demon, and the intensity of relationships forged with my comrades in treatment. *
Love, love the last stanza. ****