I walked to work back then, about twenty-five minutes through a city with few pleasant sights. One was a playground, but I passed at an empty hour, long before it held screams and scurries, before parents intent on merging a social slant began their morning chats. It reminded me of a science fiction film, one where everything remained but the people, like the children supposed to be playing had been plucked away.
I remember a day different than the others, different because I could hear something, a mother's voice. She stood by a swing, pushed it gently, laughed, called her son by name.
“You're a bird,” she said. “You're free!”
I smiled at her enthusiasm, but it subsided, replaced with grief. The laughter from only seconds before had turned to cries.
Closer, the truth became clear: she pushed an empty swing, a lonesome mother left behind by a child who had been plucked away.
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A version of this appeared in Tuesday Shorts...back when there was a Tuesday Shorts.
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A chilling beauty.
What a desolate feeling at the end. Really well done.
"Closer, the truth became clear: she pushed an empty swing, a lonesome mother left behind by a child who had been plucked away."
Harrowing. Good writing, Foster.
Packs a punch. Top notch story. A+ / *
Poignant. *
This grabs me. *
I like how plaintive the voice is.
This is such a heart-wrenching scene, perfectly rendered.*
Caught me by surprise. Perfect setup for a devastating finish. *
Gave me chills. *
*, Foster. Terrific. The close caused a gasp. But, reading it the second time I found this to tell the story:
"You're a bird,” she said. “You're free!”
Free, indeed.
Ahhhhh. A fine picture, powerful in its void.