An Open Letter For Zombie Rights

by Erin Zulkoski

To Whom It May Concern:

Hello, my name is Fred Tillman, and I am a zombie.  I am writing to you today to promote zombie rights.  Yes, that is correct: zombie rights.  Too long have we lived in the negative shadow of media's portrayal of us.  We are people, too.  Or were people...but by no fault of our own, we got turned into zombies.  You've seen the movies depicting us--usually a mutant virus, or too much television is what made us this way.  We can't help it. We are what we are, and that is zombies.

Sure, we're undead and unusually bite-y, but darn it, we're zombies! Let us be what we are meant to be.  Would you tell a bird not to fly?  A fish not to swim?  No.

All I am asking for is that we be treated no differently than you.  Do not run away in terror when you see us lurching after you.  Maybe we are just coming to ask for directions, or a recommendation for a nice restaurant.  Do not judge a book by its cover, even it it's a zombie book that may or may not want to eat you.

My point is this: we deserve all the same privileges as you, the living.  And with your help, one day, we can achieve harmony and peace.

Thank you for your time.

Your humble zombie,

Fred Tillman