by Darryl Price
The Strongman used to weep alone in his
single dusty tent at night, all of us
could hear him, sobbing, thinking about the
one incredible time in his mostly
miserable life he accidentally
brushed his thick arm skin against the soft
backside of the Invisible Girl's sweet
bobbled head as she turned in mid-laugh. It made
him so weak in the knees to think about.
It punched the entire reserves of air out
of his lungs over and over again.
He worshiped that invisible spot on
his very visible arm, constantly
looking at it, touching it with swollen
fingers. He could find it in the dark. It
was always there. Sometimes he would wake in
a cold enough panic wondering if
in the middle of the last stars it had
somehow finally worn off, disappearing
into thin air, leaving him nothing but
his own rough skin in its place, his fields of
wheat-colored arm hair to welcome the burst
of a new day with, only to discover
that yes it was, thank God, still there, as ever,
melting him in ways he wasn't really
used to , but that he really couldn't go
on living without ever knowing once
more, he was sure, either. Of this he was
absolutely adamant. He was trapped,
tightly wound, like a dumbfounded beetle
bug in a jar, seeing ahead only
the world in which she so casually
lived and played, but not being able of
course to join her in any way out of
it all. It warped his view of everything
he had to live for. He pumped his iron junk
without another thought entering his
head for days at a time. She was supposed
to be marrying some little faggot
hippie juggler type guy from another
faraway circus troupe anyway. A
questionable Russian whom some people
had said was a stinking robber Gypsy
fellow simply hiding out from the law
in plain sight and using the good old sweet-
hearted folks at the circus to do it
with. Didn't matter, nothing did. He knew
that much. He didn't care one way or the
other about those kinds of flat facts and
full figures. He didn't deserve her. He
was fooling her. What she took for love was
just a con game probably played out on
many an innocent woman before
her. He hated everything about that
stinking commie from his rotten, peeling
bowling pins to his incredibly lame
stupid looking long braid of jet black hair.
The Strongman always kept his own hair cut
bristle short and to the point. Once he thought
about letting his hair grow out just for
her and then calling himself Hercules,
the Most Powerful Being in the wholeblasted
Universe, but he could never stand the
long growing it out period, so he
grew a nice big mustache instead. A great
big bruiser that, simply stated, always
said, “Don't ever mess with me if you want
to live to talk about it,” in about
a dozen different wiry ways. At
least that's what the mirror kept telling him
as he dried his eyes with the backs of his
enormous fingers.
Now one day the Invisible Girl, who
was only ever partly there on the
best of days, overheard a couple of
new clowns,Chuckles-A-Lot and one Douche Bag
Donny, talking about the gossip that
everyone else now knew by heart but her.
How the thinnest of bare chances within
the briefest of moments with her own dull
brown head had brought him down, like some kind of
heavy metal space junk, crashing to the
ground like a giant redwood forest tree
and reduced him to a gently fallen
over meal for termites and other overpopulated
crawling insect societies .She blushed
and blushed and blushed some more at the very
thought of it-- that only made a little
bit of her left shoulder visible to
the ground around her. One huge nosed clown, the
only seventh level in the whole sad
daffy joint, went on to say,”Did you know
he even went so far as to leave her
a toothpaste poem written on the bath
room mirror, before he, you know?”She could
not bear to hear any more of this, this
utter, crapable nonsense. What did the
poem say? It couldn't be true. It just
couldn't. She didn't want to believe that
her stupid hair had been capable of
such deceit without first gaining her own
consent to comply. She'd always loved the
Strongman, as a good, and loyal, friend, a
someone she could trust in the craziest,
worst times of her life to always have her
back. He was sometimes fun to be around,
to flirt with, in a pal to pal kind of
grumpy old man sort of way, and well his
skimpy Fred Flintstone costumes always made
her laugh out loud, even so many hours
later in the day. He'd always been the
perfect gentleman around her, pulling
out her chair at lunchtime, opening tent
flaps so she could make her professional
grand entrance unnoticed by the crowd, and
bringing her glasses of ice water on
all of the hottest days of working in
the warm summer weather. Her soft trail of
unforgiving tears rained down on the room
and pooled out, one by one.
No one saw much
of her hair or the rest of her body
after that, even though not many had
ever seen much of it to begin with.
She and the juggler had had a bouncing
baby boy, I am told, that easily
steals from all the other babies without
ever having been seen or caught once in
the act and is at least seven times as
strong as any baby elephant up
and walking around looking for some new fun to be had.
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There's always been a kind of romantic notion for me tied to the very simplest idea of the circus. Whenever I went I was always imagining the lives behind the make-up and the glittering costumes. The people behind the entertainers who must confront the daily realities of human bodies and human minds and human emotions like the rest of us.
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I like this circus world you’ve invented. Is there more of it?
Oh this is just gorgeous. And brilliant. I'd fave it more than once if I could.
Nice form, DP. Effective piece. I like.
A solid piece that touched me. And what an ending. If Robert Coover cared more about the reader he might write like this. Wonderful.
The first paragraph alone is a heck of a story.
Wild ride that pulls you along for the fun of it whether you want to or not. DP, I am enjoying your new foray into flash very much.
*
Thanks everybody. I've had this one, this story in my head for quite awhile now. I started to write about all the characters I could think of who might inhabit one circus at a time--their lives, their back stories. This was actually the third that I wrote. I really appreciate your time and energy spent with me on this one. Thanks for the comments.
I really like this one, Darryl - it feels like prose-poetry and the tone is great.
Brilliant! *
It's evident you have as strong a hold on prose as you do poetry, friend.
Charming an disarming. Completely irresistible.
*
Charming AND disarming!
There is a distinct typography in this story. It looked like a James Tate poem typographically to me, but I notice in the comments, that it is intended as prose, leaning that way instead of poetry. The spirit in it reminds me of Sherwood Anderson (high compliment on both Tate and Anderson). Anderson so good at showing eccentricity and human diversity in a way not typically meant when we say "diversity" today. *
This is utterly amazing. Ohh, Invisible Girl.
Ann and Jane--thank you so very much for visiting and listening to the story. I wanted the sadness to leak out in several different directions. And of course the ending pretty much puts away any speculation about motive.
Yes, charming. And magical. And....