Admit Nothing
Escalator in the Metro, 2 A.M. Is it really a quarter mile long, this stairway to heaven? She confessed as much, and her fear of it. She tows a big red suitcase, lanky line-jumping bitch from the crush of the entrance. Here, at the end of the line, there's none but the two of us traveling in the half-lit fluorescence. She smiles up at me, pale and strained - gratefully, uncertainly - as my bulk blocks her view of ascension into the abyss. Foot to her shoulder and push. Cartwheeling game of leapfrog, human and baggage, down an up-moving staircase. Finally, her neck rests at an odd angle — she only moves when the electric stairway rolls her over again. Bump, bump, bump. Last look, copper curls waving on the slotted steel.
The ticket out: “ADMIT NOTHING.”
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Author's Note
Written for 52/250, week #39 "Password." Alas, missed the bus that week. On the other hand, also available at kaffe in katmandu! Thanks to Marcus Speh.
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I like this piece, Catherine. Great mix of imagery and word music -
"Cartwheeling game of leapfrog, human and baggage, down an up-moving staircase. Finally, her neck rests at an odd angle — she only moves when the electric stairway rolls her over again. Bump, bump, bump."
Especially like the closing. Nice writing.
I like this, Catherine. I can feel it, having ridden those escalators many times myself. I wasn't sure about "ascension into the abyss"...thinking of the abyss as something one descends into...but great, great last line.
Thank you guys for reading and commenting. Really pleased that you two fine writers like this flash.
Sam, I fave 'word music!' thanks for this lovely thought.
Kathy, great to know that it's working for you viscerally. And you're right, to ascend into an abyss is oxymoronical connotation-wise. I'm just perverse this way... so the question will be - does it rankle more than its works?
And thanks, both of you, for the feedback on the last line.
Whoa! *
Niiiiiiiccccccccceeeee....
my words will spoil this for me. you got all the right words.
*
Quenby and Susan, thanks! Appreciate your reads and the favs.
Great mean scene! *