by Angela Brett
One ev'ning I went to the pub for a beer
and later went home to my bed.
As I went off to sleep I was feeling quite queer,
and the world turned around in my head.
The pieces of bread dipped us humans in cheese,
the cheese made by cows from our milk.
Early worms got the birds, while they made their pongees
from our swaddling, and christened it silk.
As letters sent men they would each seal a kiss,
which itself stole a beau, what a turnoff.
And Soviet Russia was in all of this,
poking fun at our man Yakov Smirnoff.
The horses on knightback were chased by the steeple,
convinced they should set the truth free.
And wars fought in soldiers then started the people,
till their shoes walked a mile in me.
Then science was checked by remains prehistoric:
the reptiles who warmed up the air
and caused the extinction of things meteoric
while the common were sought by the rare.
At some point, I think I awoke my alarm,
but I don't know quite when in the tale,
for certain events have a true-to-life charm,
for a man who is drunk by his ale.
This poem was inspired by a Guinness playing card showing a man pulling a horse in a cart, and was partly written at 4a.m. after I had indeed consumed approximately one standard alcoholic drink.
A first draft of this was originally published on my blog at http://wp.me/pcDRQ-H, and this revised version was published in Offshoots 10, the anthology of the Geneva Writers' Group.